The Bridesmaid Dresses!



I am discussing everything wedding today! If you follow me on Twitter, you might’ve noticed that on February 26th, I finally got fitted for my maid of honor dress as the rest of the bridesmaids had gone in early January, since some of the girls were still on break. We were supposed to go, but my nana had been having some issues with her health and my mom didn’t want to risk leaving her alone.

It was during this trip that they got to pick the style of dress they wanted to wear, because I think Blondie was going back and forth on what exactly she wanted us to wear for the wedding, she originally didn’t want any kind of lace. She didn’t want it on her dress or ours, even though I believe if you’re going to have a Disney (and Superhero) theme wedding, lace would be a classic go-to addition. Ultimately, the rest of the camp found a dress that they liked–after trying like 8 others–and it has lace on it! So technically I was happy about it and I didn’t even express my opinions on it, because I feared I’d get yelled at, so I kept my mouth shut!

The girls that went are all wearing one shoulder strap dress, that has thick lace material all around the front that gradually goes to the left shoulder and it has a nice bodice with a thin belt just before the bottom flows out; it’s very soft and it has an airy, so you can do a lot of movement! The girls will be wearing it in the color “tickle” which is described as a lighter shade of pink. The color scheme that the couple has went with are pink and silver.

Here are Sam, Jace and Jayde modeling the longer dresses, trying to get fitted into their sizes, on the first day there!


I’d say the middle (Jace) is almost the gray/silver they’re going for, but all of the dresses will be in that pink, while Brandon, his groomsmen, and my dad–yes, he’s wearing a tux, but with a bandana–are wearing silver tuxes and I think pink ties! Oh, and brown shoes! Yeah, my mom and I are still wondering who’s idea that was because Blondie was there with them as they got fitted for theirs!

Now on that day I finally got fitted for my dress and I will be truthful when I say this, I am pale as a ghost and have awkward shoulders. I have previously explained this several times on here about the fact my shirts always fall off one of my shoulders, no matter how many times we try to fix it, it’ll find a way to slip right off! When my mom looked to see how big that strap was on the shoulder, she was really worried if it would even stay on the shoulder because it is a thick section of material and I have such small shoulders, that we were wondering how would this work on me?

Well, the day we arrived there, it was partially crowded with brides and their families and friends. Dad dropped us off while he and Brandon went to get his tux and pants fitted (he was NOT in a mood to do this at all!) and I sat quietly in my wheelchair fighting the urges to look through the dresses and wondering if I would have to find another dress because the chosen one wasn’t going to stay on my shoulders.

We were taken into a little fitting room, because I did not feel comfortable to be out in the open as she took my measurements. The lady was not exactly liked by my sister, mostly because she had measured her friend Jace wrong the first time they were there, saying she was one size when she wasn’t. We have never measured my body before, even for prom, mostly because both dresses were bought from JC Penney and Dillard’s. This had happened again when she measured only my chest and bust, but not my hips. So she started us with a size 2 and 4.

The size 4 barely went over the top of my head, we never got past my ears, and we tried to go in reverse and put my feet in first but my ass was too big for it, so I clearly wasn’t a 4. We tried a 5 and then 6, an 8, and finally found out that 10 was good, it went over my head and fit perfectly, but I could hardly breathe! So we figured that a size 12 would be better in case I did in fact gain more weight over the cross of the next few months and my mom didn’t think I would be able to eat and dance in it either.

Between my hips, ass, and the damn zipper we were having the worst time trying these dresses on! In a way, my mom and I were happy that I learned to transfer and stand up nice and strong on my own two feet, but my poor pinky wasn’t having to do it multiple times. Blondie was the one actually pulling it up to my chest and attempting to zip it up, as my mom was the one holding up my upper body. By the second or third try, my sister just situated herself behind me where I was literally sitting on her lap! I loved her for that because my feet were ready to give out a couple of times. When we got to the last dress, her poor thumb was red and slightly swollen after trying to pull it up at the back.

This was the end result of that mess!


Now as you can see how the dress is on my upper body and most importantly my shoulder, you can see our concerns of the material being so much that it actually looks like it could slip off! I refuse to go strapless though, that was my rule from the get go, was no strapless dresses for me! I don’t think it would stay up. It’s not the size of my bosom that I was concerned about it is mostly because since I can’t move my hands to lift it back up, I feel it would be a disaster! So when it comes in, we’re going to have that section altered and tighten on my shoulder and hopefully we won’t have to really worries about it afterwards!

As I’ve said above, the six bridesmaids are wearing long dresses, since I am the maid of honor, I am wearing a “short” dress. However, the more we went up in sizes, the length of the actual dress kept increasing! I wanted a shorter dress because after both of my proms and having a long dresses, I would have be careful in driving my wheelchair because I would run over myself! I cannot tell you how many times I did that during my Junior year. I think when I wore my brown dress for Homecoming, I had my mom tie a hair tie in the back to help keep everything together so I wouldn’t get stopped by my dress! I believe we did this during prom too, but I don’t necessarily remember. We’re hoping the length hasn’t changed drastically to this dress that we’d have to do the same thing, but you never know!

Unfortunately, I don’t know what the brand the dress is originally from and I’ve looked it up and still didn’t find anything about it. The price for the actual dress is $179.95, I think Blondie said she had a discount, so I think they would be a little less than that; also since it was a short dress, that also should make it cheaper, but I think it was still around $100 which is what I told myself I did not want to do was get something so expensive, but it is mine and if I run over and ruin it, I don’t have to give it back to the store like my dad and groom have to! Haha!

What do you do think of the dresses? Yay or nay!



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Every Year In May

MilestoneAn action or event making a significant change or stage in development.

The last week of May is when the new year’s graduation mode is on full swing. Between prom and graduation, those are the most funnest times in a student’s lives. This goes for both the new graduate and new upperclassmen who get closer and closer to their chance to be free too. The first year after I graduated, I went to graduation at my old high school (just saying “old high school,” makes me feel old!) to support the students I had classes with, but my memory is a bit of a blur. Because I remember going to the last two years graduations but I’m not sure if I went to the year after or not. I think it rained on us one year but I have no clue what year it was, I’ve been to a LOT of graduations. I’ve been to nine graduations (three were family related and including mine because my cousin was in too) and so you can understand how I could get confused here. Anyways, the time in between becoming a junior and graduating high school is a very overwhelming feeling I thought. It makes your time as a junior such a rush to get the year done and then go into senior year and you are feeling rushed with passing state tests, finals, and getting those damn transcripts and scholarships turned in on time. It’s exhausting for one person to get through!

Every year in May, I feel like I look back at my life more than any other month. It didn’t just happen by mistake though, ever since I graduated high school I’ve continued to do this. In the last full week of May, I get a bittersweet and happy feeling within me. I understand the bittersweet feeling as I am still feeling like I’ve been skipping school everyday of the year. I still wake up around 6:30 or 7am and think back to the times that my parents overslept and the bus driver honking the horn a couple of times. I remember the rides to school, dreading the day ahead but looking forward to that last class. It’s what everybody imagined, but I think after a while the graduates would forget about their morning routines they had for high school. Considering I didn’t go on a bus for college, this is what I have left of a bus ride. The happy feeling I get is very strong for me during this time too. I’m happy to be free of all the worry of did I fail that class or final? I’m free of the bullcrap that I had put up with for the last seven years of my life. I’m just happy to be free, but bittersweet of the feeling of letting go.

I feel like I look back at my struggles and the journey that God put me on. It was very chaotic and almost felt too much at the moment, but something got me through it. The two years of so much stress and over thinking about every single thing basically took over my outlook on the next chapter of my life. Everything I wanted to do in college wasn’t going to happen like I wanted, at that time I was VERY bitter and hated everybody that had an opinion about it and I had grown a hatred for myself in the process. In the fall of the same year, I had taken myself into this dark hole and buried myself as far down as I could go. I even had dreams years before of myself being chased in what seemed like a fun house full of clowns and for some freaking reason I dreamt I was scooting whereas the majority of my dreams had me standing up like a normal person, this one I was in my true form. It looked the clowns had made this hole and I was running (scooting very fast, which would never happen now!) and I slipped down and I couldn’t get myself out. Many nights later I found a way out and I just start climbing out, using every part of my body that I could use. Mind you, everything that doesn’t work now didn’t work in this dream either. Once I was out, the clowns were gone, nowhere to be found. When I got out of the hole years later the insecurities and worries were gone too. It’s funny how dreams have a way of coming to light after you go through something that would traumatic like this.

I’m not saying I have a perfect run every year. I know I don’t. There are a lot of things that can happen in a year or a month that can bring a person down. I choose to see things like this, every day I count in my head of the good things that happened. If there were three good things that happened throughout the day then I can’t call it a bad day. In my mind, I’m giving myself another choice to say it wasn’t a crappy day, but it wasn’t a great day either. It was a good day. I feel the word “good” is the word to use in the middle of both feelings. I choose to look back at this month as a time where I left part of my story and began another chapter, every year and every May is a reminder. It’s good to have memories that show you where you’ve been and how you felt, it just makes you stronger for the next part coming up.

Going All Neutral!

It’s another Monday here and surprisingly after all the storms last night, it looks like the sun is trying to make its escape from the clouds right now. On Monday’s, I am apart of the new challenge called #BloggersDoItBetter and the topic for today is bright and neutral. At first, I didn’t have a clue what to write about, especially since I had written about nails last night! The only idea I actually got just now is going all neutral with absolutely no make up at all! We’ve all seen the different challenges and celebrities take their makeup off and then post a “selfie.” Some odd reason, that ends up front and center on a magazine website. Well, my question for you is, well I have two questions for you actually.

Have you ever went without make up on your face and chest?

How many days have you went without makeup before?

What I’m about to tell you right now will be kind of shock for those of you who can’t leave the house without some sort of makeup on. I never have makeup on. Literally! When I was younger, I was like every other girl in school looking at other women and girls and loving the bright blue eye shadow and lipstick that my nana always used when we’d go out to eat. I remember her letting my sister and I wear this very light shade of pink lipstick into Red Lobster, Blondie looked very good with the pink that it actually became a thing with her later on in life. When I hit middle school and high school, I was in the middle of liking makeup and hating it at the same time. It was something I couldn’t do myself because of the fact that I can’t reach up that far. So my mom and sister would have to do it for me in the mornings.

There were very few days in my senior year that I actually wore makeup because that’s when I just got so tired with it, that I just gave up on it. My sister would have nights were she was bored so she gave me makeovers and I always cherished those because they were so rare. Afterwards, we’d basically have a little photo shoot in my room. For my senior year prom I actually didn’t wear any makeup at all. I only had that fake tanning stuff that you put on your body and after so many times of using it, the skin gets tanner. My dress had no sleeves and the chest area was open and we only used it twice in the two weeks we had to get ready for it. My chest was white as snow but my arms and shoulders were somewhat tan. It was a disaster!

It’s kind of funny for the weird days of actually wanting to put on makeup, but thankfully I have none so those thoughts go away as fast as they came! One essential that my sister always has is her eyeliner and mascara. She never really uses lipstick/lip gloss anymore, but she uses a natural blush on her cheeks. Something else that’s interesting that I don’t allow very many things around my eyes (you should see how I am at the eye doctor!) but I am fine with Blondie putting the eye makeup on me. I trust her a lot more than anyone else in that area. In September, I am going to a wedding and I’m trying to decide if I want her to put eyeliner/mascara on me or not. My problem is that I don’t know if I can get my mom to do it if she’s at school that day. I do know that I have to wear bold red lipstick as my friend knows that it’s on my bucket list. It’s only on special occasions that I want to wear makeup, but on other days I want nothing to do with it. So, do you think you could go a day or two without a shed of makeup on your face?

Most Expensive Clothing Item You’ve Ever Bought

lightsoutI don’t usually like to blog about fashion, but when I do I usually have a very good reason to do it. I’m usually the one who goes to Wal-Mart and picks clothes out that way, I don’t care that they’re not designer. At least they’re durable and cheap. Now when I was a teenager I was very pressured into wanting to have what everybody else had, but as I grew up I started noticing something after my mom told me that the majority of the stuff that the popular kids had, were basically knock-offs just made me realize that there wasn’t anything special about them. When I became a junior in high school, I remember going to the mall and watching my little sister practically sprint to her favorite stores: Hollister, A&F, and etc. She didn’t like shopping for things on the sale racks let’s just put it out there. Funny thing was, majority of her already designer brands she had were from yard sales, her friends and family. We never went to the stores and actually bought them before this time. My poor dad can’t go into Hollister or A&F because it’s so stinky and definitely not wheelchair accessible either. So I stood out with him.

When we first went out to get clothes for the new school year, I remember I had raised money to spend there and my mom was willing to pay for only one thing for the both of us. I am one of those people who I will show my folks something and say, “This is neat!” but I will not buy it, because well I’m stubborn that way. I’m one of those people who if it attracts me not once, but twice than I will do everything in my power to get it. Before this, this was my most expensive item I’ve ever bought–not counting my prom dresses I’ll explain those later–we went to Victoria’s Secret Pink and my sister and my mom were looking around at the smelly stuff (lotions and spray perfumes) and tees. I ventured into the pant racks and found these very loose yoga pants. This was even before I had become obsessed with leggings too! I loved these pants, I have a texture problem with my feet and fingers so just feeling it and seeing how soft and detailed they were but not so tight that they felt like they were going to cut me apart at the waist. Everything was going good until my mom saw the price tag and even before we walked in my mom told me that I had basically blown all of my money. I was having a really good shopping day at the mall! Anyways, it was $40 for one very thin pair of yoga pants. She kept asking me if I really wanted it and even though she was willing to pay for anything under $50, I was hoping to find something a little bit cheaper than that! It’s whatever though because I still caved and got them! It was very worth it as they became more of a pajama bottoms than anything else!

Now about my prom dresses. Even though it kind of feels weird to be talking about prom on this day, because if I can remember right my senior prom was today (April 16th) so this is kind of bittersweet thing for me as I miss those days, it’s the getting ready part that I’m not missing as much as some would think. Senior year I had this beautiful brown dress that was silky smooth, much like a milk chocolate bar! It was cut like a V in the front and was very open in the back as well. We had strict requirements for all dresses back in high school, I kind of figured I would get into trouble for it, but I didn’t care. For this dress, I wore it to both my Homecoming ceremony and prom. I was up for homecoming queen in my last year and I had to begin my dress shopping a month after Christmas. I had gotten an $100 gift card and I had basically used it all for this dress. However, the dress was not $100. I went looking for cheap dresses nearby and I found it on the Dillard’s website and I fell in love with it. It was on sale from $80 to $50. To some, that’s not much of a drop, well to me it was and I knew I had to get these dress. It kept calling my name! After Homecoming came and went and no, I did not win. I remember asking my mom later that night what we were going to do about prom that was three months away. She said that if I wanted to, I could get another dress, because my dad wouldn’t want me wearing the same dress for both things. Well, I felt extremely comfortable in it to the point I actually felt beautiful in it and that NEVER happens. So I kept it and used it for my prom. I never regretted my decision to this day. I just wish I had went with my gut with my other dress for junior year. I hated that dress and that was even cheaper, $30 at JCPenney. Not bad really!

If I do any shopping nowadays, clothes have to be under $35, even though I basically freak out if something is priced $29.99 and there’s nothing really there making it special. That’s one of my things, I love things that have graphics on it, but with my hands and texture problems, glitter is a no-go but rhinestones are fine! I am hooked to all kinds of leggings, but mostly love anything with skulls! I love tees and blouses that have studs and spikes on the collars and shoulders. I love anything floral and with quotes on it. My favorite stores are Vanity, Wet Seal, Hot Topic, and Buckle. On the dresses though, my favorite designers are Alyce, Jovanni, Elie Saab, and Zuhair Murad.

What is your most expensive clothing item? Not jewelry or hair accessories, clothes? I’m really curious how much you’re willing to pay for something. What are your favorite brands and designers? 

Prom Madness 2014


Like I promised, I have enough energy and have lots to talk about for my second post of the day!! So first off, this is my sister’s dress. It is a one-shoulder dress and it looks pinkish but that’s mainly because I added another effect to make the picture pop, but really the color is a mixture of pink, red, and orange. I wouldn’t even call it coral either, because I had a coral dress and mine didn’t look like hers. Anyways, it’s got some “bling” on the one strap going around to the other side and has a short skirt but also a long trail in the back. It’s very pretty and different from both of our dresses we’ve had in the past. This is the first year my sister has ever had brown hair instead of her blonde locks. Also, she has her trustee sliver high heels that she’s had since the end of middle school and they still fit her too! Thank god for them! Her date was supposed to wear his army uniform, but instead he got a nice black tux and white and gray vest. He even got her a cute little corshe that matched his vest.

We’ve had a nice afternoon, before everything happened, we went back to the house and chilled out for a few hours as we knew it wasn’t going to take her that long to get ready as she was going to do her hair herself. So she got ready at my nana’s house like every prom. While she was getting ready and curling her hair, my nana let me finish off what was left of my ice cream. After she was done, it was picture time and she took pictures of herself for her friends on Snapchat. My mom took out her phone and started snapping a few, but while nana was working on something, Blondie wanted a picture with mom. Nana was busy and I thought I’d just take it. I have a mini iPod Touch and I love it, but my big toes don’t really fit well on it. So when she gave me her phone the first question was, “okay how do you work this thing?” Thankfully, it’s just one button, but I had troubles with keeping my feet steady as I kept shaking like crazy, afraid it was going to drop down to the floor. It didn’t and I successfully did my first picture on a touch screen phone. I’m moving up in the world! It’s those little things that make you happy! Afterwards, she wanted one with our nana and I went to do it again, but I kept shaking and by this time, my mom was watching me and laughing her ass off. Apparently it looked like I was driving a car steering wheel and making a left turn! I have a good sense of humor and I was even laughing at myself! It was the nerves damn it!

Around 5pm my sister started to get a little worried as her date wasn’t answering his phone and when he tried to call him, it went straight to voicemail. My mom was outside on the porch, and noticed this white car basically circling the block really slowly. He was clearly lost. My mom came in and told her, “is that him?” and she went running out the door and missed him twice. He went around the block about three times and even asked a family, who were going to the same prom and asked for directions. When she finally got outside, they had to practically yell his name down the street. Poor guy! When he saw the waving hands he turned around and took pictures with his date and I finally got introduced to him officially as did my mom and my grandparents too! He said that he went around the block for only fifteen minutes but it felt like an hour. After he gave her (still shaking) the thing that goes on her wrist, they took a couple more pictures and then they left. My mom and I were a little bit behind them. We had to park in the back part of the parking lot of the school and we saw one of her friends, she came over and introduced her friend and gave us hugs. When we went inside, it was a bit weird as I hadn’t been inside that building since my sister graduated last May. The junior class theme was “Take My Breath Away” and every year, they usually have soft music playing in the background but this time they actually had a real song. It was “Take My Breath Away” by Jessica Simpson and it played five times throughout the whole grand march. I won’t be listening to that song anytime soon and I’m pretty sure I know every word now.

The grand march theme was lit up like a freaking Christmas tree, but a very girly tree though! On the floor was gray paper, there was a paper that had a gray brick pattern like they were stepping on stones. Surrounding the step like path, were some kind of ruffles with white lights inside the ruffles. There were small black trees on two different sides by the bleachers and they were lit up, that’s why I gave it that expression. Also, they had a small black bridge that they made and every year, since girls like to wear long dresses and high heels, those types of props aren’t the best ever. When I was a junior, our prom committee wasn’t thinking clearly at all and our grand march just looked awful! My senior year, they had a fountain and I loved that! All right, now onto my favorite part to talk about, the dresses! Every prom there is always a theme of dresses, usually it’s just one but this year it was two! The short dresses were a BIG thing this year. So basically, Blondie had the right idea as everybody else had the short front but a train in the back. The other trend was the sparkly dresses! Lots and lots of dresses that had glittery detail.I love to look at dresses on Pinterest and kind of wonder if anybody will ever wear one that’ll recognize and I only saw one that I have pinned! There were also not very many plain dresses either! There was one dress that was tan or some call it “nude” and it looked absolutely beautiful on this girl! I saw a lot less animal print this year. Thank god! I saw two beautiful red dresses and five purple dresses! The only dress I actually wanted was the full gold sequins dress. The guys were very handsome and some even surprised me! However, there was one that I’m still trying to figure out. He wore white pants that cut off at the shins. Everybody in the room giggled, no joke!

As my mom and I were leaving, she turned to me and said that she didn’t really like very many dresses this year. I disagreed with her, I pretty much loved every dress I saw tonight. That never happens! What surprised me was none of the guys wore their army uniforms. Something else, I didn’t know very many people there and I felt so old because of these juniors and seniors were now about to turn into adults soon and I remember them being so small! Once we got back into town, my mom did our basic prom tradition, rent movies for me. I got both Frozen and American Hustle. So in other words, I went from a G rated movie to a R rated movie in less than two hours. I’m still working on the second movie and they’re due back tomorrow before they close. I may not be able to finish it tonight. That concludes this year of prom madness! I don’t know if my sister is going next year or not. So this may be my last until fate leads me into another prom soon! Enjoy your Saturday night and be safe!