Already A Crazy Friday.

So today is Friday! Thank god right? If you’re like me though, sometimes getting excited for Friday’s is kind of stupid. Everyday feels like a Friday to me considering I don’t hardly go anywhere during the week and I’m usually keeping busy by listening to music and reading. So everyday is like a weekend for me. If I have plans for the weekends then all I want is that week to fly by just like it does when I’m doing my usual, but whenever I have plans the week goes by so slow. I hate it.

For my mom and sister, Friday’s are the best days ever considering they get two days off. Since I have these shows on during the weekday, it doesn’t seem so bad. All week-long is a different night of something to watch except for Monday and Tuesday, they are my two days of Dancing With The Stars. One is a good day, the other is liable to be a sad day of your favorites going home. But as soon as it’s over you can retreat to your next favorite spot that makes you happy after a long day. Your bed.

When I woke up this morning, my left eye was bugging me. It might be because of my hair going all crazy in front of my face or my crazy eye lashes falling off like leafs during the last months of fall. Except mine are getting caught on their neighbors and bugging the crap out of me. I’m getting over it because I don’t feel like getting back to my bad mood I woke up with this morning. That’s what I hate the most. You wake up on a Friday morning in a bad mood for no reason. I sat up and got online and didn’t even want to read my book. Which is odd since I couldn’t keep myself away from it yesterday. I wasn’t in the mood this morning. I wasn’t in the mood for anything really. My internet was being slow today and my patience isn’t here today. So I gave up on that for 30 minutes then I got back on to better results.

I was on my Twitter and Facebook. Doing my usual. Reading everybody’s problems and funny posts like a crazy person. Right before I got offline I was on Facebook of what was supposed to be for the last for an hour. Dj Ashba had updated his status (which also sends to your Twitter) and he had said that he hasn’t had a cigarette in 10 days, and that is very good. I posted a reply on his Facebook first then went on Twitter and posted “very happy you’re quitting smoking. Hope you have a good day.” My phone was already blowing up with all the people I was talking to, but something inside went about two minutes after I sent that reply, that it might’ve been him. I love unexpected surprises that are good. I had tweets from my friends then a reply back from Dj. Whatever bad mood I was in this morning isn’t here anymore. I was very happy, probably too happy. Thank god I’ve come back to Earth about ten minutes afterwards.

After that my friend Kate and I were talking about Nikki Sixx, and I told her about Mike and Chester from Linkin Park being on SixxSense tonight. So we’ve been trying to figure out how to listen to this, considering neither one of us have listened in before. Nikki Sixx + Mike Shinoda + Chester Bennington = Awesome combination. I had to look on SixxSense’s website to see how to listen in. Thank god I saw the “Listen Live” at the top before going off the site altogether. That was like two hours ago, I’m still on I Heart Radio listening to different radio stations. Just killing time until four, since Dr. Phil comes on at that time. So hopefully somebody posts on their Twitter’s what time it comes on because we both live on opposite sides of the planet and I got Blue Bloods on tonight. Which I won’t mind missing it for these guys I mean, come on.  Well hope everybody has a great day.

Top 20 Sexiest Males

Well one of the trends on Twitter today is “#10sexiestmales” I don’t usually do that kind of thing because I either forget a few people or I spell their names wrong. I was doing pretty good typing them all out and them I got to #7 and of course, my brain decided to think. I forgot a few sexy males to my list. Then I realized that I haven’t exactly blogged today. So I’m ruining my good blog with the letter to Nikki Sixx with a list of my Favorite Sexiest Males. I’ve tried to do one of these lists before and include their pictures but that was a bust, so I’m just typing them out. It’s better that way. I’m also including my Twitter list to help me figure out who I’m forgetting.

  1. Paul Walker
  2. Dj Ashba
  3. Channing Tatum
  4. Adam Levine
  5. Ludacris
  6. Mike Shinoda
  7. Duff McKagan
  8. Donnie Wahlberg
  9. Brian Littrell
  10. Ian Somerhalder
  11. Chad Kreoger
  12. Mark Ballas
  13. Bobby Flay
  14. Joseph Morgan
  15. Rob Bourdon
  16. Michael Trevino
  17. Sal Costa
  18. Dave Navarro
  19. Josh Todd
  20. Blake Shelton

Dear Nikki Sixx

All my life I’ve never been a big fan of myself. I hated what I looked like in a mirror. I hated the fact that I wasn’t like my sister whatsoever. I didn’t have the blonde hair, hazel eyes, all of the muscles she had in her arms and legs. In my disease, not only is it a joint disease where all of my joints are locked in place but I have less muscles than a regular person like me. I’ve always compared myself against my sister. I’ve never really hated her for being the “perfect” one, but I’ve hated myself. Hating yourself is a nightmare. Just this past weekend I remembered all these feelings I had when I hated myself. The feeling of you can’t do this or that and it got to the point where I was so mad at myself I hit the floor with my foot so hard it hurt afterward. Then I remembered not to be so mad because it’s not my fault I can’t lift myself off the floor. The reason why I can’t lift myself is because my back side is too heavy. I have metal in my back. If I hadn’t had the spinal fusion surgery back in 02 I could have died. It’s just a blessing in disguise.

That’s how I see life. Everything is a blessing from God, and life is beautiful with both the highs and lows. We learn from everything we do. Everything we get introduced to is there for a reason. So when I got introduced to the story of Nikki Sixx and started to listen to a lot of Sixx:A.M. I started to think. How can a guy like Nikki think a person like me is beautiful? I’ve been told from family and close friends (including Twitter friends) that I was beautiful, but I’ve never taken them seriously. No offense. At the time I was listening to “Lies Of The Beautiful People” and watching the music video and holding back tears because nobody outside of that comfort zone has ever said that. Even though it wasn’t directed to me, personally. The song and video (mostly his photography) captured me. So I started thinking well if he likes me for who I am, maybe I shouldn’t give up hope on everybody. Everybody tells me I’m inspiration. You want an inspiration? Read about Nikki Sixx.

He’s changed my sense on life. How I choose to see people. How I choose to see myself. I still have my doubts. Everybody does, it never leaves. I’ve been thinking about getting a tattoo. I’ve never gotten one before. I want to get “Life Is Beautiful” on the side of my right leg. I’ve always hated my legs. I’m always wearing long-sleeved pants because shorts and I don’t get along. I want to be bold like Nikki and say something meaningful. Life is a beautiful blessing we have. I shouldn’t care about what others think of me. I should be proud of what I got. Having a tattoo of a song that means so much, hell even the band, they mean so much to me. They’ve changed me on how I look at everything. So why shouldn’t I flaunt something like that? I’m not the type of fan who would drive a celebrity crazy constantly, so this is what happened. I let it all out on here. So thank you Nikki Sixx, Dj Ashba, and James Michael. You changed me into thinking everything in life is beautiful just the way it is. My senior quote was “Why be normal when you can be so much more.” I don’t think I’m normal, instead I think I’m beautiful. (:



So today is almost finished. I’m actually sad that it’s ending because today was one of my better days I’ve had in a while. And that’s even before I became sick, I had a few sad days but I didn’t want them to be true so I kept denying them. I remembered yesterday, I was listening to metal bands all morning long and then I stopped and instantly got depressed. I wasn’t myself and I had made a promise this morning that I wouldn’t be sad today at all. So what did I do? I listened to everything (almost) that made me happy yesterday once again. I even found more stuff and listened to the older stuff that was replaced by the new. I was happy to know that my voice was starting to sound right again, and I could actually hold a note while I sang. Oh, that was awesome! I could breathe through my nose and even smelling different things. Earlier, my dad and sister were watching a movie in the living room and somebody made popcorn and I could actually smell it after four days!

It just turned 11:30pm and I’m not tired (yet) and I’ve got my headphones and listening to my “starred” tracks on my Spotify account. At the moment, I’m listening to “Shot In The Dark” by Within Temptation. I can’t stop listening to rock music, can’t I? I’ll probably end it as soon as I’m done here and go to YouTube and watch some Sixx:A.M. videos. It’s a routine I have now. If I don’t hear them before I go to sleep, it’s a wasted night. I must have that last image of Dj Ashba to get me to go to sleep at night. I’m such a weirdo. I read my book before my mom came home from work. I’m really liking this book, and I’m starting to be happy I’m sick because this book has a lot of sad parts in it and I can’t cry when I’m sick. It would end in disaster if I did cry. Anyways, it’s a good book. I can’t wait to do a book review for you us after I’m done, but since I’m at like 28% it’s going to be a while until you get a review. Sorry, well I’m going to go. Goodnight. ❤

New Round Of Friends

I’m a fan of so many things it’s crazy sometimes, however I don’t react the same way like everybody else does. When it comes to like the smaller things that I like, I tend to be a little bit more excited about. The bigger things, it just depends on my mood for that day. About 95% of the time, when it comes to celebrities of any kind. I don’t fangirl a lot. And you can ask some of the Linkin Park fans that I follow, they’ll tell you I rarely go crazy about anything that has to do with celebrities, mostly musicians. When I do go crazy, it’s usually gone within an hour or so. I don’t like to fangirl as much. I think its overrated. People talking about their favorite celebrities is one thing, but going absolutely nuts over them is dumb! I must admit though, when I do let go of my little wall I put up to guard myself from even going too insane, it’s building itself back up.

Now telling you, I have to tell you this. Last night was pretty interesting. Since getting into Sixx:A.M., Motley Crue, and kind of Guns N Roses, I’ve been trying to follow more fans from each band. Luckily, a bunch love all three so I tend to get lucky. My first social network site I started finding a bunch was on Tumblr. Weird part is, my Tumblr likes to be a jerk everytime I try to get on it. It wants to freeze up and I have to exit out that tab and start a new one. Anyways, I like talking to them, and I also love their pictures they either post themselves or reblog, I’ve noticed that I’ve been reblogging lots of just DJ Ashba stuff. Not really complaining since in every picture I’ve blogged he’s drop dead gorgeous! Sorry, but true! Anyways, they’re a lot of fun!

Something I’ve noticed over the past month is that there is a different age pool between these three bands. I think most are my age and up. Which is nice, because being a fan of Linkin Park on Twitter, there’s like four or six of us who are not in our teens anymore and the rest of us are around 15-17 years of age. Not a big gap. With these three bands so far, I’ve met around three teenagers and the rest are my age and probably about their 30s, depending on who will tell their age. They’re an interesting bunch of people and again, like with Tumblr most of my new Twitter friends are Ashba fans. So they tend to be very nutty, and that can go either way. They’re fun to talk to. You definitely won’t regret it that’s for sure!