Top 5 Crushes | MEN



Now we’re back with the second round of celebrity crushes and this time it’s all about the men! If you didn’t last week’s post, that’s all right because I will explain it again. Choosing only five guys is very difficult compared to the ladies; at least with there, I have a good top 5 and top 10 list whereas on the male side it just depends on my mood and whatever I have watched or listened to throughout the day.

There were a few times where I kept thinking of putting the Skarsgard, Hemsworth and Leto brothers on the list and have them be counted as one, but the more I thought about it, it just seemed too weird so I didn’t add any of them! So figuring out a definite list was even harder to do, but I did promise more singers on this one because I seem to be more attractive to male singers than female. I don’t know why though because I can relate to their lyrics and feelings more.


Tom Hardy – British

As I’ve said above, this was a difficult thing to put together but I do have to say that even if I couldn’t put down five guys, I could have just done a whole post about Tom Hardy. I know a lot of people who probably wouldn’t had mind that at all honestly!

My dad and I have seen a lot of his movies. For at least four months straight, we were even on exactly how many films we’d seen with him in it: 11, but now that my dad has seen Legend he is now beating me at the moment! However I feel like it shouldn’t count because he said that the movie itself was “good” but he didn’t like all of the British accents. I disagree with that statement, I think British accents are sexy as hell, however I do believe Irish accents are better, sorry not sorry! If Tom Hardy has a film where he’s speaking in a full on Irish accent send it my way please! Thank you!


Johnny Depp – American

Yeah, I’m saying it! Johnny Depp is hot. However, I got on the “Depp train” later in life. Apparently watching had a triple duty and I didn’t realize it until later. Don’t worry even I’m disappointed in myself I didn’t cave in before!

In my defense though, the movie trailers I was seeing him in at the time were the Pirates Of The Caribbean and I don’t like him in those types of films where his face is covered up. It took me about four years just get myself to feel comfortable to watch Alice In Wonderland because I literally had to keep telling myself “Johnny Depp is underneath all of that make up” over and over again! I can’t watch his films from the late 90’s and early 00’s unfortunately, because I find him more gorgeous as he ages. I’m saying that in a good way, don’t get ahold of me Stephanie! 😀


Luke Evans – Welsh

I know, I know, Luke is gay but that does not mean that I am comfortable with giving him up so quickly! Funnily enough as I was going through my Pinterest board full of amazingly hot men it was another gay man that reminded me about Luke! So I knew I have to add him onto this list and doesn’t he count for a singer too? I mean, he did play Gaston?

I found Luke later on in life too. You can actually than my Uncle David as he took Kristi, Chris, Blondie and I to see Fast Five when it was still in theaters and this was how Kristi and I were first introduced to him. We literally left drooling over him and Paul Walker! I have to add Michelle Rodeguiez, Elsa Pataky, and Gal Gadot onto that statement as well. Anyways, ever since I’ve been trying to watch as many films as I can with him in it, except for The Raven I did try to watch it, but I have never been able to finish it.


Oliver “Oli” Skyes – British

Oli Sykes! I made up a rule when I started my rock/heavy metal phase in 2009, I would not look up any of the bands I listened to until I had fallen in love with at least five songs or more, which seems like a good idea considering I was familiar with the gothic scene of that time so I just wanted to give myself some space and learn to love what I was hearing, not what I was seeing on my screen!

Bring Me The Horizon was one of those five original bands that took me a good three years to finally get into fully and then I realized how freaking hot rockers covered in tattoos from head to toe were and then also thanks to Oli I began to enjoy neck tattoos and I know if I ever brought a guy home with a giant neck tat my dad would kill me or him!


Alexander Ludwig – Canadian

I remember watching the first Hunger Games film and absolutely hating the character Cato, he was a cocky son of a bitch and I was kind of happy in a way that he died at the end! Again, sorry not sorry! I also thought Alexander looked really, really young in that film. He looked like a teenager, which for any actor in their early twenties can be a plus in a way, but then thanks to my father and I began to back track to my original thoughts of the fact he was that cute.

When Alexander is on Vikings, he has a growing beard and he looks so much older and like he’s like two years younger than me! When he appears on the later part of season one he still looks pretty young but then as I’ve seen on YouTube, he looks more grown up and really good looking! I just hope he isn’t as cocky because that would be a big turn off honestly!

On my other post I included a few more people and I figured I’d continue on with that tradition and say Henry Cavill, Theo James, Christian Bale, Brantley Gilbert, Charlie Hunnam, Ian Somerhalder, David Boreanaz, G-Eazy, Will Smith, and Jonathan Rhys Meyers. I really hope you’ve enjoyed these posts!

What are some of your male celebrity crushes? Do you have a certain type you go for? Let me know!


Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Bloglovin


Top 5 Crushes | WOMEN


This is another prompt I got from the Safe Haven: Annoymous Letters website! I thought I’d split up my lists because I actually have more of a list on the women’s side, the males are a bit difficult because I sort of change my interests for them. Every actor, model and/or musician has been in and out of the list multiple times in the past. So I’m going to leave them for later, and I’ll talk about my female crushes first!

Funny story before I start on this, I put up on my Facebook the other day that I was going to do a Top 5 Crushes post and I wanted to know everybody else’s “celebrity” crush! I had them respond with a gif only and it was pretty funny and interesting to see who everybody liked, some were expected but some weren’t. For anybody who decides to do this on their Facebook, it’s better to put the word “celebrity” in front of crush or else somebody that isn’t family and remembers who you liked in high school just puts his name in the comments. I haven’t felt that red in my face in a long time!


Megan Fox – American

Here’s a good one, I was one of those people who did not see Megan Fox beautifulness until I was actually forced to see Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen in theaters. I know that whole sentence probably blew your mind, because I am a HUGE fan of the Transformers films but I will admit that I saw this first and kind of fell in love with it obviously.

I try not to see Megan as this sex symbol in every movie I watch, but that has always been a struggle with me because once I saw her in this, I was like every other guy and basically would faint at the sight of her. I’m happy to say that it didn’t die out when she married and started having kids.


Phoebe Tonkin – Australian

Before she went on to star on both The Vampire Diaries in 2012, Phoebe was on the other CW show called The Secret Circle and they only had one season and it was the show I was not only introduced to Phoebe but Britt Robertson as well. I was sad when it got cancelled, but when she appeared on TVD as a werewolf and eventually moving on to The Originals as a full on bad ass character I was so happy!

Apparently I’m more into Australian women than men, well besides the Hemsworth brothers! Between her, Teresa Palmer and Margot Robbie, the Aussie blondes are so good looking! And yes, Phoebe is naturally a blonde, even though I do like her more as a brunette!


Marion Cotillard – French

The same year I saw the Transformers movie, the week after we went to see Public Enemies starring both Johnny Depp and this beauty Marion Cotillard! I’ve always secretly loved her! Those blue eyes and brown hair, she has this old Hollywood glam to her that I just love seeing back on the screen! I literally have the war film Allied on my DVR for my dad, but really it’s for me because the more I see her in different films I have to watch them! 


Natalie Dormer – British

These next two literally do NOT change out of their spots! They have always went back and forth between one and two!

I’ve known about Natalie Dormer since watching Rush, yes that was the first ever film I ever saw her in. If you’ve seen that movie, now you know why she’s so high up the list! Anyways, I try to watch anything with her in it. I’m REALLY behind of course! I love her both as a blonde and brunette! I think she looks more like a bad ass with her dark hair, she also looks very mysterious with it. Whenever she’s blonde though, she tends to show off her softer side and I tend to think of her as the next Lauren Bacall.


Kate Beckinsale – British

Kate is my #1 favorite women! She’s just so flipping sexy! I find it odd that I’ve only really seen her as Selene in the Underworld series though! It’s actually difficult to find her in a film that I’ll actually watch. I’m very picky when it comes to films despite the fact that I have a crushes on these actors and actresses, sometimes I’m not willing to watch certain movies with them in it. For an example, I tried watching Natalie Dormer in the film The Forest and I really did attempt to watch it twice, but could not get myself to feel comfortable watching it! So I either need to suck it up or be okay with the fact I might never see another movie with Kate in it.

If this list isn’t enough for you, I do love Cate Blanchett, Katheryn Winnick, Rose Leslie, Georgia Hirst, Elsa Pataky, Gal Gadot, Miranda Kerr, Hayden Panettiere, and Margot Robbie. As you can tell, I have a lot of actresses I only just realized this, but I’m pretty sure the guys will be about the same and maybe a couple of musicians here and there. I’ll get started on that post soon!

Do you have any women crushes? I mean, it is WEDNESDAY for crying out loud, tell me some of yours!


Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Bloglovin


When Your First Love Gets Married



February has always been that one month that you dread, but as a kid in school, I have to say I enjoyed it because back then we didn’t have any of this dating crap. We had couples that “went out” for a couple of weeks (or days) but there was no pressure to being in a relationship.

I remember every time we had to make Valentine’s Day cards. I’d make ones for my friends but I also made a couple of extras for the boys I had crushes on too. What still gets me though is that half the time, I’d have somebody else give them the cards because I couldn’t do it myself. I still have the memories of the fourth grade passing out my Mickey and Minnie Mouse cards with the cherry suckers taped on the sides and whispering to a friend to pass it to so and so. Everybody knew it was from me though, between the red face that matched the color of the lollipops completely and well, nobody had footwriting like moi!

I can say I had a lot of childhood crushes. Every person will agree with me though, it doesn’t matter how many people you chase after, nobody will ever compare to your first love.

My first crush… I  still look back on the memories of those days where he was very caring and how he could make me smile on a whim. We never dated. I just loved from afar, if you want to call it that. I’m pretty sure he knew I had feelings for him, because everybody else did, including his own family!

When we were in middle school, we had Winter Ball, a formal dance that all of the middle schoolers could attend. If you went to the dance, you could get your pictures taken by a real photographer. In the previous years, I was in a lot of group photos and this time because I knew it would be our last dance before prom, so I wanted to ask my crush to be in the picture with me and if I remember correctly I actually went up and asked him if he would. I had to go and find him in the massive crowds (the fact I never ran over my dresses was a damn miracle – can’t say anything for Junior year though!) but I did find him and we waited in line and I felt horrible about taking him away from all the fun he was having with his buddies and date. Well, that second part is a bit of a lie.

We got our picture taken and within a week later, our photos were delivered to our homeroom classes and I remember being very happy that I got this picture back. Everybody in my family was also ecstatic! My nana still has a copy of it and mine is on top of a bookshelf in my room as we speak! As for him, I remember him telling me that for a number of months his mom had it taped to the fridge and to think this poor boy wanted to continue to be friends with me after that!

I’m not bitter that he’s now married, I can’t say I’ve never been bitter whenever he’d get a new girlfriend in school. I do remember feeling really un-beautiful though, but that is normal behavior for teenagers. I say “is” because it is normal. I have realized that there was nothing wrong with me, he just wanted to be friends with me. That’s all my old crushes ever wanted to be with me, but because I knew I was failing at ever having the whole “high school sweetheart” it pretty much destroyed me in a number of ways.

When I found out he was married though, I was shocked at first, but I was also happy for him. I did borrow my mom’s shoulder that night because I just needed that reassuring I was still enough. I would have used my dad, but he doesn’t necessarily like it when his girls cry, especially over boys because all that ever makes want to do is get even so I didn’t lean on him that night.

When your first love gets married before you, at first you feel like you’re going to need a couple of glasses of wine, pint of ice cream and a shoulder to cry on. My advice for you is to one of these things, if not all of them. I think a good cry is okay, but being down on yourself about the past thinking of if you hadn’t done this or that, if you were prettier in school he would belong to you. You can’t think like that, because you can’t change the past. All you can and most importantly have to do is move on.

I would say you need to watch the best movie for this type of situation: Legally Blonde.

Ms. Elle Woods went out of her way to get into Harvard Law School. She wanted to prove to her newly ex-boyfriend that she could be wifey material despite her ditzy personality. She worked hard to become a student at Harvard and became a perfect student, suffering the wrath of his new fiancée, and yet at the end of everything when she won her case and he saw how much of a badass she really was; she realized that he was nothing to her! So she not only found a new calling in life but she also found her true love there too!

It’s so interesting how cliche the whole ending turned out, but yet it was honest. You never know where your soulmate will find you. You might be acquaintances from school or work, but you could also be complete strangers. You never know where you’ll find that person. I like to think I’m Elle in a way, I’ll find somebody one day that accepts me in all my flaws. He’ll understand my life a disabled woman and he’ll hopefully support my blog. He might even start his own blog or write a book about taking care of me and our little family in the future. Until then, I will relish in the single life one day at a time.

Tell me some of your favorite (or not so favorite) childhood Valentine’s Day memories! 


Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Bloglovin

Know Your Exit

I’ve never been one to hide any true feelings from both the past and the present.

So I have something to release right now.

It’s been a strange two years now. I’ve been learning how to deal with some very important things in my life. I feel like I’ve been detoxing the negativity in my life. I’ve been feeling a lot of pride in myself to be able to do that in this stage of my life. Being that I am still young, I know I’ve still got lots to deal with later on in life, but at least I’ll know how to “treat” myself in the good and bad. I’m still trying to figure out the whole mediation thing. I’ve tried doing it twice, but I’ve still been getting quite confused on what I’m supposed to be doing. Anyways, I’ve learned to not count every boring day as bad. If three good things happened throughout your day, it was good! I hardly get mad at anything, however the times I do, stay away from me! I’ve been learning how to breathe slowly in through my nose and exhale out of my mouth, imagine myself feeling calmer. I hardly ever worry anymore, because why worry about things when you can’t change about how they started or how they’ll end. That’s just a few things I’ve been really working on in the past year.

Blogging becomes a big help in finding my inner peace too. I can just talk about (not everything) a bunch of things that might be bothering me. Sometimes it’s like an itch, you have to talk about it. Through blogging I’ve leaned that I may be helping somebody else in whatever is going on with their lives too. It has nothing to do with my disability–it’s just a feeling that you can be relatable to somebody else’s thoughts and feelings. So I’ll start by saying that we’ve all crushes sometime in our lives, I find we usually get crushes our crushes on the opposite sex while we’re in school. When everything is over, not only do some of your friendships end, but so do some of your interest in those crushes too. Only a couple rarely still exist a few years later. By then, the connection is off and everything that you liked about that person may be a lot different now, like physical features, likes in music etc. It can either be a great release of that person and/or it could break your heart that maybe you have moved on from that person.

I’ve felt a lot of joy in having a lot of crushes in many stages in my life–in school, I’ve said since I was in a wheelchair, I was more of the perfect friend than a girlfriend in general. Recently, I’ve realized that maybe the guys that I’ve always wondered why they never gave me a chance, were only being nice and treating me like a friend to them were actually saving me. Even though, I still remember the broken heart everytime each one would get a girlfriend. I would usually cry my eyes out at night and my poor nana and mom had to hear me each and every time it happened. Whenever one was in a relationship, I did manage to find a new one to replace that one, which I find now a great thing. I wasn’t obsessed with them and their girlfriends, even though in the beginning I had tried to befriend their girlfriends. By the end of my high school years, I had grown out of that and switched my loves to celebrities. So maybe falling in love Ian Somerhalder had its good intentions in 2009.

When every one of my crushes finds somebody, I’m truly happy for them. I’m glad that they’ve found somebody to love them always. I think it’s a great thing for me to realize this now, as a single woman. It shows that I can move on. It shows others that just because they meant so much to you at one time, you can move on from them without being bitter about it. It’s all a learning process of course! Some can make it happen and then there are those who can be obsessed with that person to the point were they’ll do anything and everything to ruin the relationships that person they may be crushing on and that is never cool. Be a lady or gentleman and let that person go, you both deserve a chance at love but maybe it’s not meant to be with each other and you’re just going to have to accept it. So to all my old crushes, yes I once had a thing for you. If you’ve found yourself in a great relationship or maybe even in marriage, I wish you all the best and thank you for never ignoring me and making only a good friend. That’s all that matters now.

That Uncomfortable Disney Crush

Click to see source
Click image for source

So ever since ABC Family went on one of their classic animated Disney movie weekends, I went and I taped Pocahotas, The Little Mermaid, and Mulan. I don’t really like Peter Pan and I completely missed Dumbo so these were left. I love all three of these movies, but there are two weird things about them though. I kind of like the second movies of Pocahotas and The Little Mermaid more than the originals. I love the first Mulan movie, but I don’t think I’ve seen the second one as much as I’ve seen the rest. The second thing is and I’m pretty sure I am not the only one who is like this, but I grew up having a bit of a crush on three different characters in these movies. I mean, I was utterly in love with how these guys looked that there might actually be a reason why dark hair and blue eyes have always been a weakness for me.

Prince Eric was always a handsome guy, whether he’s just a drawing or not, I always thought that. He just seemed like he cared and instead of finding a bride by their looks. Since he met Ariel by hearing her voice, the sunlight was basically shielding her face, and so he just the melody of her voice stuck in his head and yeah, you guys know the story. At least, you should know it. Even in the second movie, he was a hottie! He was married and had a daughter, he was still pretty cute to me! Watching him fight to get his daughter and wife from Ursula’s baby sister, those scenes just made me all happy inside and I know that’s weird to say but it’s true. The second guy on my list of when I developed a crush on him, just makes the whole blonde hair and blue eye thing just worse. I had a minor thing for John Smith, but funny enough he wasn’t the only one. I also had a pretty big crush on John Rolfe from the second movie, both of played with my heart. I remember when I got into the first movie, I was probably already into the Backstreet Boys, so the whole blonde and blue eyes were already a damn weakness for me, but it’s bad when a character in an animated movie gets you too! I think I liked John Smith the most because he was nice enough to see past what she was and treated her like she was apart of him. I still don’t know why I like John Rolfe so much though.

Click image for source
Click image for source

It’s so weird that after all these years, after not being able to watch some of these movies, how much I still know the words of what each character says and the songs. It’s so crazy on how it’s just muscles knowing what the next thing is, my brain doesn’t know a single thing but everything in my body does! I literally just finished up the first Mulan movie and from the time the viewers meet Captain Li Shang, all of the girls get sucked in the cuteness of his face and voice. Now fast forward about ten to thirteen years, to watch the show Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and recognizing one of the actors’ voices but never knowing how you know it so well. One of the actors that used to be featured on the show, B.D. Wong. Yeah, he voiced the character Li Shang in the movies. I just found that out tonight. I think it’s sadder to say that this character is cuter though. Sorry dude! I liked Shang’s sense of humor and his will to fight and protect. There’s another weakness coming to light. Another thing that is slightly disturbing, I actually enjoyed the shirtless scene. To anyone who wonders why I like guys with huge masculine shoulders, blame this guy! I can sit here and talk about this dude all day, but I did love the friendship/relationship he formed with Mulan in the first movie. 

So let’s be honest, since I was so honest about my old and apparently still crushes on these Disney movies, did you ever fall for any of them? If you liked them for the actors who brought them to life, that’s fine too! Here are a few characters that you or your kids were probably obsessed with and you were sitting on the couch drooling over too. Tarzan, Gaston, Beast (in human form), Prince Philip (from Sleeping Beauty), etc. Come on, tell me, I’m not judging as long as you’re judging me.