Springtime Inspired Baby Names!

Happy May!

I have really embraced spring this year!! Despite the fact that this Coronavirus or COVID-19 as it is mainly called on the news, has basically taken away every part of big springtime celebrations, I am still enjoying the season for what it is: a renewal of life! And people becoming parents for the first, sixth or tenth time is a huge change to life and lately I have been trying step up my game on look to the positive side of things like a baby being born into this crisis, and instead of seeing worry and eventual death, I see the color yellow and hear laughter!

For today, I am going to talk about my favorite springtime inspired baby names for boys, girls and even adding some unisex names to the post. This could be a long one, so I apologize if there are parts were I just start rambling silly things!


So, first we are going to discuss my favorite girl names because spring automatically makes me think of little girls with their Easter dresses in pastel shades! Every women loves when there is a break in the cold weather to wear their favorite dresses, whether they are long or short, it doesn’t matter they want to rock something different than thick sweaters and jeans with faux fur boots!

I also have to give a shout out to a friend of mine who allowed me to help send out some suggestions for their little girl. I tried my best but after sending so many bohemian (boho) names, I suddenly started falling in love with a bunch of them and everything about it gave rise to the idea of getting this post together!

Greta –  I have always loved “Greta” but I know how strong of a name it looks and sounds, so it is not always one that I talk about a lot. However, I do think the boldness is a good thing, because it gives an edgy sense to the little girl who gets to use it for the rest of her life. I think it is a pretty for a baby, toddler and for an elderly woman, but once she gets to her teens she might be bored or embarrassed about it, so might opt out for a nickname and I found that “Etta” which is becoming increasingly popular as a standalone, could be cool!

Poppy – Poppy is one of those absolutely adorable names for both a female human and animal, although I’d never call a cat ‘Poppy’ as I tend to chose regal names for them, but dogs and rabbits could be cute.

I know it is very popular over in England, but something about it doesn’t stop new families from wanting to use it for their daughters! I do wish it could increase on the national list of names used in the United States one day.  I find this such a sweet name but figuring our what kind of nickname to go with it has become a bit difficult for me.

Harlow – I don’t think Harlow will ever leave my favorite list. I have loved this name since it was announced that Nicole Ritchie and Joel Madden named their daughter Harlow Winter Kate in 2006. Honestly her whole name is still a combination I rave about to people. I went to school with a girl, who’s youngest daughter is named Harlow Claire. I also think this is a great pairing, it’s really sophisticated compared to the uniqueness of the Madden’s picks.

Indigo  – When I was fixing a list for my friend, this was one of two names that I really never liked, especially ‘Indigo’ mostly because I always saw it as a boy name, but I don’t really understand how it ended up on my lists and not hers!

I think a reason why it entered my space is that it is a word for the color purple. I don’t care for Mauve, Violet or Lilac, but I do enjoy Lavender a lot! I am very picky when it comes to purple in general. I am more into lighter shades like lilac, but I am more of a fan of royal purple; the darker the better!

Isabeau – Now I know this one might seem strange, but one of the smaller objectives of this post is to add various names. Greta and Isabeau may not be names that remind you of this time of the year, but they do for me! I think it is a great alternative to Isabel/Isabella. Since everyone loves those versions, I thought this could be cute but strong against other names out there!

Ophelia – Since I was never a fan of William Shakespeare’s plays–they were honestly the least favorite things to read in high school! I wasn’t really introduced to Ophelia until about six years ago! I had just made my first baby name board on Pinterest and it popped up on my feed and that’s it! It does come and go of my lists but whenever I see it online, I find it to be a cheery name for a little girl. It is one of those rare names that work for any age!

Jane – Jane is such a simple name, but I find that so attractive! Everything about is lovely, but recently I found out it also adds an interesting quality that I think people tend to forget; it can be used as a way to give originality without even trying! A combination I have found precious honors my sister Emily, but also gives the child a way to become her own person. Emilia Jane is the whole name. I find the colors pink and yellow come about whenever I tell people of it online. I also see a child bearing these names being original but passionate over the significance over the special meaning too.

Athena – Ever since I found out my name derives from Greece, I have been obsessed with other Greek names! I also love the mythology, so I am a lover of the Goddess Athena. She is a Goddess of wisdom, courage, the arts and justice. She was one that was very beloved in Ancient Greece.

Since I am a lover of royalty, I find it odd that it has never been a popular name in females throughout time. There is only one I know for sure that might have roots in Greece and that is the Danish princess Athena, daughter of Prince Joachim and Princess Marie. Her great-aunt is married into the Royal Greek family, Queen Anne-Marie, younger sister to Athena’s grandmother Queen Margrethe II.

Dove – This is another recent find, and I mean really recent, I would say around 10 months ago I found out about it as I was watching the Disney Channel film Descendants 3, one of the main actresses has the name Dove and I find she is exactly what I’d picture a young woman with that name. She’s very pale but has gorgeous blue eyes and blonde hair! I find it hilarious that once I find and put it on my list, everybody is using it like crazy!

Hazel – For a while, I didn’t like Hazel. A part of me thought it was too old of a name for a daughter of this generation, but then one of my cousins used it with her second as a middle name and then I started putting together different combinations and using them on name games on Facebook and Instagram!

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For most people, when they think of springtime they might be into pretty girl names. Oddly enough, I had the opposite thing to happen! I feel it might have something to do with St. Patrick’s Day being in March that makes me think of Irish names for little boys! And I do love more boy names that come from both Ireland and Scotland, but when I was going through my big list of names I knew I would have to shake things up and give you others that you may not assume to be perfect names for spring!

Leif – There is always one name that you absolutely love and have a special meaning behind it, that you literally leave out of every “favorite” list you make, or at least I do!

My love of the name ‘Leif’ comes after reading a book in high school, it was called The Last Leaf by O. Henry. It was about a story of two women artists who were living in New York. They were both healthy until came down with a really bad illness and was on death’s door. She told her friend and roommate that once every leaf falls off the tree outside the window of her hospital room, she will die.

I found the story very different, I saw it through a reader’s point of view and as the artist too, because at this time I was taking an art class, and I had the same thinking as the sick woman in a way. After I finished the final project, I was going to be done with it for a very long time. I basically killed it off, but I kept the special quality of the story and fell in love with the name Leif in a way to honor my love of the art and story.

Rhodes – This one has a similar backstory as well, as I love photographs of roads fading off into the background, and whatever journey a person can take going forward, made me see this name in a different light.

There are times where I enjoy it more as a girl name, but then I’m back to only having it as a boy name. I also don’t really use it as a first, I like having it as a middle and it adds a quirky but adorable way to name a little baby.

Thoreau – As the previous two have a long history with me, this is relativity new to the list. Everytime I see it, a spring green appears in my mind, but I also has a nice city vibe too!

Another part of it that I really like is that it is rarely used still. I look through our local newspaper and I never find it listed to both boys and girls. So, if you are looking for something a little different or if you like the nickname, “Thor” or “Thora” this is a great way to have a strong name but also calling your child after a Marvel character!

Forest – I love Forest so much! Now I’ll be honest, I wasn’t much of a lover of it when I was younger because of the film Forrest Gump, but I did grow up knowing one kid in school with the name! I often wonder what he thinks about the sudden surge in popularity it has been getting in the last five years?

I think Forest with one “r” is really sweet, but I have issues whether or not it sounds awesome for an elderly man. Hmmm…

Camden – When 2014 rolled around, suddenly the name “Camden” became a big standout and I was such a fan of it the moment it came out! Nick and Vanessa Lachey named their oldest son Camden Jack and then less of a week later Kristin Cavalleri and her husband Jay Cutler named their son Camden John. Unfortunately, I wasn’t a fan of either combination but it never stopped me from loving the name so I thought of this as a big win!

Oliver – Here is a fun fact for you! While my sister was pregnant with my nephew, there was a chance that he would have been called Oliver. The only reason why they let it go was that my mom threatened to give him the same nickname we gave our childhood cat Oliver which was “Mem-mem”. So they decided on Nolan as his first name.

I still love the name, but I don’t necessarily understand the big deal of naming your child after your beloved pet. I mean, if they meant a lot to you then I think it’s really sweet to give it to your baby too. Audrina Partridge named her daughter Kirra Max, after her dog she had for a long time and passed away while she was pregnant with her baby girl. For some names, it is totally a cool trend, but nobody would be able to use “ChiChi” as a nickname in our family for obvious reasons!

Cillian – As I said above, when I think of spring names, I instantly think of St. Patrick’s Day and I love Irish boy names. Oliver and Cillian both have Irish meanings but I think Cillian is the cutest of the two because it works with all ages. I am also into having a “C” instead of the “K” that everyone mostly uses, because it looks more like a Gaelic name and of course, it looks more manly or strong.

Holland – I have recently fell back in love with it as a name for a child. Originally, I only liked it for a girl but I have never cared for the name “Holly”. I think the fact that it’ll be used constantly during the month of December, thanks to the many, many Christmas carols! Also, I just think it looks and sounds dated and tacky, and I love different era names!

Noble – I found this one several years back, as I heard it on an episode of Blue Bloods and I immediately had to quickly put it on my list! I have to say, I was really watching that show on a limited basis, but I guess something good did come out of it, it brought this handsome name to my attention.

It’s been really nice to find out that couples are finding and enjoying it as much as I did when it came on my radar. I think it’s a clever alternative to my nephew’s name ‘Nolan’ but I do have to say that both are rising on various popularity lists around the country. What I like about it is, it’s a masculine type of name but it is also an interesting quirk about it too!

Cove – So, this name hasn’t always had an easy time with me. Honestly, when Cove and Lennon first started gaining momentum on the charts, I couldn’t understand the love for it. I just hated both of them, and what is even more odd is that both transitions were fast! Like when Aspyn and Parker Onard revealed their daughter’s name was Cove, I instantly hated it but within four months later, I was fine with it. I saw it with another beloved favorite of mine and changed my mind on what I felt for it!

So, now that we have the boys section done, we can move on to talk about some of my favorite unisex or neutral names. Honestly, I think the only reason why I decided on doing this part was so that I could add more onto the post! What is even worse is that I changed my first setup of listing five of them at a time, but as I continued to go through my jumbo list for the banner, I realized I had too many good ones to leave it altogether, so here we go for the last time!

Callahan – Everyone can develop a special feeling towards a name, like we discussed with naming your child after a favorite pet. Whether you are inspired by your pet, famous celebrity, athlete, etc that it is your choice and I will forever say “go for it” but I feel like the reason for why I love this name will make a lot of people laugh–including my mother!

In 2002, right before we left to go to the hospital for my back surgeries, one of my aunts and cousins gave me a present and it was the VCR tape of Legally Blonde. It was one of three movies that I watched all of the time. Whether it was 12 hours before surgery day or 5 hours afterwards, it didn’t matter I wanted to watch it and it’s literally no wonder why I (and my mom!) know EVERY word in it.

Now let’s go back to this post. Our main character Elle has a professor named Callahan, and he is a shady ass dude! If you haven’t seen it, you must be living underneath a rock or something! Anyways, everytime I hear it on the movie or online, I feel like it could be a great name for both sexes. The first five letters “Calla” is a flower so if you are like me, and want to mask the real reason why you used it, you have that in your corner, but really what I enjoy about it is that Callahan is versatile in every way.

Boston – Boston is such a cute and surprisingly unique name–one that I feel should have been used a lot more during the American Revolutionary War and afterwards, because Philadelphia was used on girls for quite a bit in the late 1780’s to early 1800’s, but I never see anything about Boston! It is getting a great following now, sort of like what happened to Alabama a few years ago (but I hated that one with a passion!).

In the beginning, I was only loving it for girls too, but then I saw a pairing with a boy middle name and I thought it was really cute! There is a BookTuber with the name Boston and she looks like a Boston, and I’ve seen some very adorable boys with it lately! I’ve never been more confused on which is my favorite side!

Hunter – When I was in school, I knew a few Hunters, and always liked it on them, because instead of getting a full on hunter vibe with camo and deer heads up against a wall like a giant trophy, I always thought it was a nice jock type of name. Since the two boys I knew actually played football, it made sense to like it this way!
After watching the film Thirteen and learning about Holly Hunter in 2008 I think, I suddenly had an obsession with it being for a girl. For a while, I changed the spelling to “Hynter” which everybody hated it, but I generally like putting an “e” or “y” for other letters! After some time I have found new love for it but I went back to the original way and I still prefer it for both sexes–even though boys will always be my favorite!

Bodhi – I was going to talk another name but I rarely use it now, so I exchanged it with another favorite of mine. Bodhi is like Camden because of how popular it became among the celebrities a couple of years back. Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green named their second son Bodhi Ransom (another great name too!) and Teresa Palmer and her husband Mark Webber welcomed their first child Bodhi Rain back in 2016. Oddly enough both of them were born within days of each other! And now Ian Somerholder and Nikki Reed have a daughter with the name Bodhi Soleil.

I have kept Bodhi on my list for YEARS! I think I’ve known about it since 2008, because there was a radio DJ on one of my favorite stations who had it and I thought it was interesting–but again I was obsessed with it mostly with boy names and I have tried to make it work with some of my family names and I finally figured out two names that I think sound great with it but it’s been recently that I have liked it with girl names. I saw Bodhi Charlotte on my Instagram feed and have been going crazy with this pairing ever since! It’s a little classic but edger for a little girl.

River – River is one that has been on my lists for a very long time. I’d say the year was 2006, which is around the time I started really loving names and eventually collecting them in my cell phone. In my first phone, I had quite a bit of combinations and River was one that was constantly popping up in my head. I never kept it in a single category either, I liked the subtle quirky but woodland theme it gave to both sexes, but I did try to make it more into a middle rather a first name.

By the time it had reached its peak in 2017, I was like yes! because I thought it was such a cute name back then, I felt it needed its time in the spotlight! I really adore Kelly Clarkson’s daughter River Rose. I feel like it has a cutesy vibe but also brings out this rocker palette too! So far, she is the only girl that I have seen and enjoyed the whole pairing! However, if you have a River or collect name combos too, I would like to see what you have with it too!

Halston – Halston is very, very new to the party! I actually watched the film that had an actress by the name of Halston Sage, which I have to say is just gorgeous! I think it’s a great example for this part of the post because the combination is perfect for both sexes.

For the most part, I have been enjoying it mostly on boys but in the last few months (see, I told you it was new!) when I was helping my friend figuring out girl boho names, I kept seeing it in my mind and for about five days, I had nothing but Halston in my head for a girl. My friend didn’t really say anything about it to me and I didn’t mention my new love for it either..

Moon – I have always had a special relationship with the moon as a planet, but accepting my love for it as a name for my future children has always been difficult. I don’t really know why, but it’s only since I have been open about my favorites online among other name lovers that I have been wanting to experiment with it. The majority of the time, I have used it for boys but I think it’s great for girls too, it’s just I don’t think I can use it.

Ziggy – This one has been popping up all over Instagram in the last two months. It may very well be the third favorite of the year! I believe it works better for girls, but I have seen a few boys with it although for them they usually use it as a nickname rather than a full name. However, it’s the total opposite for the girls; namers like to pick an a sweet, but strong middle that starts with an “A” but I think if it fits these themes, it’ll give a little girl an unique way to describe herself!

Laurel – Laurel is a perfect alternative to “Lauren/Loren”. Personally, I still love the name “Lauren” and haven’t seen very many kids nowadays use it as a first in the last few years. I think Laurel is a great way to keep spring in a child’s name, but I would love it to become popular with its longer version – if you are expecting twins and you still want to use this way for one, I think it could be great on a boy!

Eden – I think everyone would agree with me when I say, I have always thought of Eden as a nice short girl name, but again like Ziggy above it has been getting increasingly becoming a favorite among people who would a different genderfluid type of name. I would also like to mention that if you adore calling a little boy “Eddie” this could be an interesting way to make it happen! Since it is so small, I think you could go long as far as middle names, like Alexander, Benjamin, Christopher, etc. I do think keeping a masculine middle would be beneficial to him as he grows up. As much as I like unisex names, it is a good thing to keep an mind pairing each name with a traditional, family or gentle middles.

One last thing I have to say, you have nine months (or so) until the child is born, so I’d hope every one is really thinking hard on the subject of naming. I’m not talking about where your name lands on the Top 10 annual lists or how unique it is, but I’m saying for at least 18 years, this child will have to bear the name(s) you have chosen for them. Again, this is my personal take on naming a child so whether you agree with me or not is perfectly fine with me, I’m just trying to give you some guidance on interesting ways to brighten up the times!

Do you like any of the names I’ve mentioned in the post or banner? What are your favorite spring time names for girls, boys and neutral babies?

snowflake

Coronavirus | When Does The Cycle End?

I wasn’t going to talk about this. I didn’t want to be another echo in a steady line of chatter, but I have realized two things about this Coronavirus madness. If this panedemic has taught us anything, it is that we truly are as human beings are only concerned about ourselves and the cliche phrase “history repeats itself” rings true to our new reality.

Before I get too far, I should mention that I hardly watch the news. Honestly, I don’t have to, social media is doing its best that it is plastered in every newsfeed, tweet, and vlog. I understand the panic and worry over your financials; I may be a disabled, but I’m not an idiot! I feel for every person who is sick in the hospital forced away from their families and the ones who are upset about the fact that everything is being cancelled.

For the past two days, I have been going through our DVR watching documentaries that I had piled up for a number of weeks. The two I want to talk to you were broadcast on PBS and a part of it’s American Experience program.

The first was about the outbreak of Influenza in 1918-19. I knew from the time it started it was an older episode because of the quality of color on the screen. It was talking to people who were infected or had members of their own family and possibly friends that were diagnosed with it and died.

It featured a lot of elderly people talk about their childhoods before and after the sickness creped into their cities and towns. What really pulled me in was when the narrator explained that it didn’t start with children and their weak immune systems. Instead it was the soldiers in the army camps that were being taken out first. You have to remember that at the time, World War I was going on and the need for young and healthy men were desperately needed to help fight the cause overseas.

Unfortunately, the war wasn’t the only killing machine out there. When Influenza appeared in the spring of 1918, there is a possibility that 500 million people worldwide came down with the deadly virus. Once the war was over, the men who came home were “healthy” to the naked eye but the disease lingered in their bodies to spread into their families and friends who were happy as clams to have their loved one back. All of a sudden the happiness was shattered when more and more people were being knocked down by the symptoms of the virus. The world was put on pause, and businesses and whole families were put on lockdown.

At this time, radio was the only way people could have contact with the outside. There was no TV for young children who were either bored or sick in their beds. They got by with doing chores, schoolwork, and played with their siblings in their rooms. To me, it is a surprise the stock market didn’t crash when the virus showed up because nobody would go anywhere. They were too afraid to!

Even though mainstream medicine was popular in the homes of American people, some could be superstitious and say that God was punishing them for their sins. Satan was there to claim every single person affected with the influenza. However, like with most sicknesses, as quickly as it came in, it disappeared! It had ended just in time as World War I was over and soldiers stationed in Europe were allowed to return to their homes again. Everyone was back to their old selves like nothing ever happened.

coronavirus news on screen
Photo by Markus Spiske on Pexels.com

The next morning I woke up, had breakfast and started watching my second documentary, this time it was about polio. Since this epidemic happened in the 1950’s, the talk about it was discussed a little bit more compared to the influenza outbreak. I heard it through both sides of my grandparents when I was younger. I never heard much talk about it while I was a teen and honestly neither one were discussed in school. You would hear someone talk about a fraction of what happened and that was pretty much it.

So, when I saw American Experience was going to re-air the episode about polio or infantile paralysis I knew it would keep me entertained for the lack of a better word.

Where the influenza had been affecting anyone from the ages to 20 to under 50, polio began to infect children the most. Adults were also struck with it too, such as future President of the United States, Franklin Delano Roosevelt or FDR for short. He was the one that everyone talked about in my family. I think it was to possibly show me that at one time we had a disabled President.

Anyways, the program was focused more on the relationship with FDR and his friend Basil O’Connor. He was put in charge of running the President’s fund and resort for more research done on polio. As influenza came and went fairly quickly, polio dragged on and on, infecting as many people as it could at various ages. Polio was known for headaches, dizziness, and eventually the loss of movement, which explains the technical term ‘infantile paralysis’.

If you have ever watched the episode of The Waltons, where their mother becomes diagnosed with polio. In the beginning you see this strong young woman become affected by a dark shadow one day. She could no longer control her arms or legs. She could no longer go outside by herself because it made her unable to walk or do anything by herself. This was common to everyone who had it. They could be permanent paralyzed and at the mercy of their families for support. Although for Mrs. Walton regained the usage of her body at the end of the show.

After Basil O’Connor met Jonas Salk, he began to look into the science behind this nasty curse. In 1953, it was announced that Dr. Salk had discovered the source of the problem and gave treatment on a number of people to test it. A year later it was said that the vaccine had worked and they moved to have it be given to everyone in America. Forty-four years later, it was said that polio had became extinct

Yet here we are again, in our own crisis, dealing with a brand new illness with really no end in sight.

History will continue to repeat itself over and over, to show us what we need to see again. When each sickness rolled into town, people seemed to be kind and stayed at home. They followed quarantine rules and religiously practiced social distancing, so to not affect anybody else with the virus. So, as we keep modern day Americans, Italians, English, etc keep gathering together for fun, we are only making everything worse.

I know you’re bored. I live at home, and rarely get to go out when the air is clear. It’s been over two weeks since I have seen my sister, brother-in-law and little nephew. Yes, I have seen and talked to them on FaceTime, but I love being face-to-face with people. So I ask you to please do everything you can to help eradicate this new virus, so we can go back to our normal lives and forget about it just like our ancestors did before us.

Thank you!

snowflake

A-Z Disability Challenge | W : Wheelchairs

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It is extremely difficult for me to talk about wheelchairs. Last year, the big contervesory was about the death of Stephan Hawking was announced, an artist made this beautiful drawing of him coming out of his wheelchair and basically walking up to heaven. As a disabled woman, I was very conflicted with this, but it wasn’t for the picture per se. It was because I felt like I had to choose between what I’ve always been taught and agreeing with the rest of the disability community.

The big deal wasn’t necessarily about the drawing itself, it was more about how a disabled person relies on their wheelchair to do things, like simple tasks around the house and/or getting out and having drinks with friends. However, everything just exploded into this chaotic thing that I really did not want to be part of at that time. Honestly, I still didn’t want to talk about it again on here, but I am on the letter “W” and there wasn’t anything else I could talk about other than this.

So, I’ll just say that my wheelchair doesn’t give me freedom. There it’s out and I can separate myself from the crap I’ve been feeling all this time.

I do think it allows me to do tasks better but I still feel stuck whenever I am in it. I really feel I am limited in both varieties of wheelchairs, as I’m either too short or too bulky! I have yet to find the perfect fit. Maybe this is what regular woman deal with picking out new heels! The second point I would like to get across is, it’s also all about your state of mind. I think after so long, you adapt to every different setting, and wheelchairs are a part of this too. You might get to do new or lose some beloved challenges while figuring out your surroundings.

Again, I have conflicting feelings about my freedom. I know I can never get away from my limitations. I say this not a sad note though, I like being able to test them anyways. I think this is really healthy! My family might not always agree with that statement, but you know. Honestly I would lastly like to say, I will believe what I want to. I have been doing pretty good on several other subjects throughout the years, I can add this onto the never ending list too! Even if that means keeping it in for a year and a half until I can find a clean way to discuss it on here, that’s what I’ll do.

If you’re in a wheelchair, whether that is full or part time, what are your thoughts on your freedom to be able do all the things you want to do? 

snowflake

A-Z Disability Challenge | U : Unconditional Love + Support

One thing that is equally important to a disabled person’s life is having unconditional love and support from their family and friends. I have always had a large group of people in my corner and as blessed as I am with all of this love, I also know that there are others like me who don’t have anybody there for them.

I have been very lucky to have loving parents that believed in me, even as a baby! They are the ones that stopped the doctors at Riley’s, when I was a few months old, to operate on me to make me look ‘normal’ when there was a small chance it wouldn’t help me. They just let me figure things out on my own. Even if that meant, I used my feet for everything and was a wheelchair bound for the rest of my life. I have never given my parents much credit to this decision because it was a risk not knowing how this little girl would be able to do things for herself. Thankfully, I did learn things on my own or with some help from other family members/physical therapists.

I wasn’t aware of how other young teens or adults with various disabilities lived without this kind of love, until I was a senior in high school.

I wish the emotions I was experiencing had sunk in as I feel like it would have helped me understand loads what everyone in my family was trying to relay to me about their worries of me living on a college campus. Now I get why they were so concerned and agree that I was not ready for that kind of commitment. However, when my mom started working at a nursing home that had residents with various levels of mental disabilities, and the stories of some of them being left at the door with trash bags full of clothes and other stuff, really broke my heart!

I do understand that some people cannot handle some traits that certain people produce but you don’t give up on your family like that. A friend of mine has a daughter who is autistic. I have never met her, but have been around other children with autism in the past. So, I am familiar with their quirks and I give kudos to the parents out there dealing with a child like this, but I’ve heard of autistic kids being left behind or being killed because the families just cannot deal with them anymore. Those are always the worst to see online, but when you feel like you’re at your wits end, what is really your next step?

So, I have a questions to my fellow disabled readers out there, did you have a good support behind you growing up? Or were you basically left to be your own hero? If you said “yes” to that, how do begin to trust others that they’re not going to abandon you at the end?

A-Z Disability Challenge | S : Sexaulity

WARNING: This mentions mature sexual content. If you are not comfortable in reading about this, I highly suggest you click the “x” button on the top right. This is an educational but personal post that I will NOT apologize for, it is very important for others with disabilities. Please respect what I have to say, and enjoy. Thank you!

Oh boy!

I think talking about disability and sex are very taboo topics. I should know considering it took my mom and I a fairly long time to even start having discussions about it. When it came to my sister, I feel like it wasn’t that bad and yes, I was there for the majority of that talk. For me though, I knew what sex was (I always have), but there were things that I couldn’t get my head around. Ha ha! Blondie was roughly 15 or 16 years old when she received the talk whereas I was 19 or 21! I feel like at that those ages, you should be somewhat of a pro when it comes to knowing things and of course having sex!

One of things that Arthrogryposis has basically taken away from me, is my ability to pleasure myself. I can’t mastrubate like other women. I have asked questions about this to a group of women who also have my condition and they’ve been helping me figure out alternatives. I also don’t think I’ve had a proper orgasm, but as I have been told, it takes a lot to get that far apparently! If you have a disability and worry about your lack of sexual experience, you know what I’m talking about, because you feel like you’re missing out on something that everyone is doing. You just feel lost in your own body and you don’t really know how to resolve this issue as a whole.

Honestly, I am afraid of having sex. As much as it excites me, because let’s be real here I watch porn and read erotica novels, and I response in the right ways, it’s the physicality that terrifies me I guess! I mean, I can barely get through a couple of seconds when I have to put vaginal cream inside my vagina, because you have to use a syringe and it makes me feel really uncomfortable – half it is because a parent has to do, mostly it’s my mom! This might be the other reason why I am semi okay with never been on a date! I’ve never had to really think about what happens afterwards; once I cross that line, how am I going to feel? I know it’ll hurt, but how much?

Last week, I watched Nikki Glaser’s Netflix comedy special Bangin‘ and oh my gosh, it was freaking hilarious! I am usually not a fan of sexual humor but the whole thing was funny! It was also shocking that she was talking about things that I have been thinking about for years! She starts off discussing blow jobs and I’ll tell you, I will NOT do that for as long as I live! What is funny though is that, it was the first sexual thing I ever knew about even before realizing it was a real thing! I still have no idea how I figured it out too. That’s still a mystery to us!

This has probably been the most freeing post out of all the other letter challenges! The reason why I felt like I needed to write about it, is because I know I am not the only one who feel like this! I think it takes a lot of guts to speak up about your sex life, and I just wanted to break out a little more because I am usually very reserved in my posts but I thought it was time to loosen up a bit.

How old were you when you received the sex talk with your parents? Now what about you had sex for the first time? Have you felt like you’ve been left out of the party of what everybody in your age group is doing in their lives?