A-Z Disability Challenge | P : The Perks of Being Disabled

Hello!

When I came up with this topic, I really wanted to get through all of the misconceptions of what it is to be a disabled person, and attempt to explain that this life is not as fun as it can be portrayed on TV or even online for some people.

Are there any perks at all?

This question is sort of tough to answer because I think it differs between the ages and how extreme one’s disabilities are compared to the average person.

As a child, I really relished on the special attention of others. When I was in the second grade, I was what you call the “teacher’s pet” because of the favoritism that was on display by my teacher and I. At the time, I wasn’t going to basically ‘fight back’ because I was eating it up so much that I remember when our teacher was taking everybody on a restroom break, she picked me up and carried me so I could hang out with everyone in the hallway. The look on everybody’s faces told me that they were a bit jealous of this affection, although nobody ever said anything to my face.

Now that we have this part out of the way, I feel like I need to say that having an aide (or personal assistant as I’ve heard some bloggers say in the past) isn’t the funnest thing in the world. I’ve loved the people that have taken care of me throughout my time in school, I still keep in touch with a few of them, but I’ve only really appreciated what they did after I had graduated. Of course, there were some issues in the past, but the one that plays out the most was after Christmas break when I was in the sixth grade, I suddenly had a new one. I only had 2 replacements and they were each a surprise. Once all of my friends realized my previous aide was gone, a lot of them were more upset at the fact that they weren’t going to be with me anymore.

My nana and I talked about this a few years later about why this happened. She’s the one who made the statement that maybe it wasn’t the outcome they were angry about, rather than they saw her as a friend. Out of all of the people that took care of me. I had one woman who was in her late 20’s. So, everything that my nana was making a lot of sense because she allowed them to get away with a lot of stuff because she might’ve wanted to be accepted among the rest of the class too, the majority of the other aides I was around would say something either to them or the teacher. I would always feel extremely guilty because if it wasn’t for my disability, they wouldn’t be in the room and could get away with the things they were doing behind our teacher’s back.

Having an aide looks fun at first, but after a while, some things get old. I’m not saying the people that I was with for eight hours, five days a week were elderly, I’m just saying as I continued to get older, I was looking for more independence but protection at the same time. and when you feel like you’re not getting as much as what you feel like you should be, plays with you a little. The one thing that made it worse was when you feel powerless in your situation because I viewed myself as a ‘normal’ person, never someone with a disability, despite driving a wheelchair around in the halls at top speed! I craved to have some space between the two that I feel like I could never achieve unfortunately.

Now that I’ve been out of school for close to 10 years, I have grown to love my body as a disabled woman. I think being away from my friends and of course crushes was a great thing for me because I wasn’t putting myself through all of that pressure to being someone I’m not. Personally, I don’t have any perks of being disabled; I struggle to do things, yes, but I don’t see the things I do as a perk nor having to ask for help for small things, I would rather learn how to do them by myself. So, my way of thinking has changed drastically over the years but I think this process has been a successful one!

If you have a disability of any kind, how do you feel about the perks? do you agree or disagree with what I had to say above? When did you realize your views on the matter changed?

Top 40 Halloween Baby Names!

Howdy!

It is finally October, so it is perfectly fine for me to talk about this subject out loud, but let’s be honest, I’ve been talking about fall since the beginning of summer! When it comes to this post in general, I’ve had to keep it hidden so people wouldn’t think I was that kook-y, but my family members knew its appearance was coming soon.

This will be in the same format as my post about the possible names of The Duke and Duchess of Sussex could name their little one. Unfortunately, I was somewhat wrong with my picks but I did get one part right, their baby boy is named after Prince Harry, just not with a name that I expected at the time, but now I really like it and everything fits well, as it’s both American and British worthy! Anyways, I will talk about eight different names from both sexes and explain why I believe each one could work for all seasons!

I think I might have went a little overzealous with this picture, but in my defense, I had a lot more names that I could have included but I decided that would be too much for me. A lot of these names are full-on Halloween themed, whereas some are not, and they are very subtle to the point where you can hide the meaning behind it. I wanted to respect everybody’s point of view with the ones I’ve selected.

Now, as I’ve successfully put this banner on here, and considering how careful I was on how everybody was straight from top to bottom, I have already found a mistake. If I hadn’t put four fairly large sections I would actually attempt to fix it, but there’s nothing I can do so if you spot it, please have a little laugh on me!

Here are the 16 names that I thought deserved a little loving, and maybe they’ll be an inspiration to you and your partner to give to your newly witch or goblin.

Abigail Rose – I think the name “Abigail” is a beautiful name. It is a very timeless, but if you are familiar with the account of the Salem Witch Trails in the 1600’s, then you might remember that one of the first people to accuse a person for being a witch was a young girl by the name of Abigail Williams. Whether or not you believe in witchcraft or if she was making it up, the name is a beautiful example of having a spooky disguise as it is still classy and elegant but there’s this little hint of history within it too.

Daphne Grace – You might not think of this as a Halloween-ish type of name, but I do. I grew up watching the Scooby-doo cartoons and out of all of the names featured on the show, this was my only favorite. I have never liked the nickname Freddie for Frederick so that is why I didn’t include it on the boys side either. Since the show was created in the late 1960’s, it still has that hippie flare that some people might enjoy.

Ingrid Alexandra – This one was inspired the character Ingrid from Witches Of East End and yes, that was one of the reasons why I also put Freya on there too, but there was a character on The Originals with that same name, but they were all witches on their shows. The other reason why I chose to use it here was because everytime I think or hear of the name Ingrid, I immediately think of the color green. I would love to read up on auras and what they mean, especially if they can appear on words or baby names, because this happens a lot and I’m always at a loss to explain the reasoning for it.

Marnie Olivia – I actually worked on the banner above back in spring, but I had switch it out purely because I forgot to put “Marnie” on the list! I think it is an important name to this post because nobody would know it was a Halloween inspired name unless they have all of the Halloweentown films growing up! I have added “Agatha” to the girl’s side too, but I think this is a quirky name to give a little girl for the witch-y vibes!

Nercissa Louise – It was so difficult not to include a whole bunch of Harry Potter characters into this post, so I was very proud with the amount that ended up making it! I really love the name Nercissa, but I’m not really sure why though. A part of me thinks it’s because it feels like a classic but has this dark flare about it too.

Prudence Alice – Now when I went to include this one to my list, I figured people would think I put it on there because of my obsession with The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, but it’s not. I generally loved it as “Prue” on the original Charmed series. I always envied her power on the show too! This is another really old name too, it actually dates back to the 1600’s, around of the time of the Salem Witch Trails!

Selene Brooke – I’ve known about this name for a long time because before my dad brought home Oliver, we had a cat named Selene. She was originally my Aunt Laurie’s but somehow she gave her to us. Selene was mostly an outside cat. She was very shy and very pretty! I remember being bitten a couple of times after trying to get close to her. After a few months, we think she took off because we never saw her again. I think my mom tried to hold off a few days before making that announcement because she really loved her!

It would be a long time before I hear the name again, but for different circumstances; this time it came from the Underworld films! I still love the name as it sounds really dark and mysterious 

Wilhelmina Amalia – Now, you might not associate this one with fall or Halloween at first, but I found out late in 2018 that the name Wilhelmina was one of the characters in a little animation show on Boomerang called “Dorothy and the Wizard of Oz”. She is the Wicked Witch Of The East’s niece that basically wants to finish what her aunt started. The TV show is cute, but I think I loved the name better!

Now that we have the girl side done, we can move on to talk about the boy names that I have picked out for you. I had a lot more word names for this part because I just haven’t been inspired to use them for the girls yet. They all just sound masculine to me, but you could still use them for girls too, so don’t go with what I tell you because these are my opinions too.

Alchemy Paul – The boys were pretty easy as I have always loved adding a more spooky flare to their names compared to the girls. I wasn’t too keen on this one at first, but I think once I figured out it is apart of both the historical and science worlds, it makes me love it a lot more. It even reminds me of my papaw too!

Byron William – If you love Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein and John William Polidori’s The Vampyre,you really need to take a closer look on what inspired both of these works. The story goes that Lord Byron brought a big group of novelists to stay in a villa and share stories. He even challenged to create the scariest story they could write and this is the beginning of history. So, if you enjoy the English name Byron but want to give it some spooky flare, here you go!

Harvest Roy – A lot of people are loving this name lately! However, the only way I’ve seen it used as a girl name. I have never loved it for a girl, everything about it makes me think of a guy! It might have something to do with football, tagliatelle parties, beer always coming into my head when I say it out, but I just love it this way. I would also only use it with smaller middle names too! 

Jasper Augustus – Out of all the Twilight names that I had in my original list, this was my ultimate favorite of the bunch! Jasper and Carlyle were my favorites on the movies, but I think Jasper is both classic and cool at the same time! 

Marius Bernhardt – When I went about creating this list, I wanted to make sure I represented all of the Halloween-y movies as I could so that I had a wide array of names to pull from, so thankfully I’ve been trying to watch the ones of Anne Rice’s books. There were plenty to use in this post, but one that I really liked the most was Marius. It is such a mysterious name but you could easily use “Mars” for a nickname though!

Poe Lafayette – There is no chance in hell am I leaving out the King of Halloween literature: Edgar Allen Poe. I thought his first and middle names were too common to be on here, but Poe is a great way to honor him. I would definitely use it as a first name, but I think it could work anywhere you want to put it. 

Wolf Travis – A part of me wanted to use “Wolfgang” for the list, but I thought it would be too much. Personally, I love that way but using “Wolf” as a nickname. I love older names compared some of the popular trends. Whatever way you prefer, I think it is a strong name for this time of the year. 

Viktor Campbell – I wasn’t going to use multiple names for the same book or movie, but the more I started picking out ones I wanted to talk about on this section, I quickly became aware that I wasn’t going to get by with it. This name is featured on the Underworld series with this spelling, but I like it with the original “Victor” for the creator of the monster on Frankenstein. It is a very serious name but I like it that way!

We are finally done with this post. This is my final baby names post for the year, or at least we’ll see! I might find another tag or talk about my favorite names of the year, but we’ll see what happens in the meantime!

How did you like all of the names above? If you were able to use any of them for a baby or maybe a pet, which one(s) would you use?

A-Z Disability Challenge | O : Saying “Yes” To Different Opportunities

I think everybody looks for opportunities to do things, whether it’s on their bucket list or just a little something they’ve had on the back burner. We all have our reasons and excuses for never getting it done before, but I don’t think there’s not a person that jumps at each opportunity than somebody with a disability.

If we see an opening to something, we will likely take it to see if it’ll work out or not. I should know, because everytime something like this happens, I will take it. I’m not the one that has the problem, it’s usually other family members that are more afraid of the ending result–they have no faith in me!–but afterwards they figure out they had nothing to worry about in the first place!

I am for the most part, pretty brave with taking on new or in this case old challenges. I would like to get back to transferring to my bed to the toilet, and finally the wheelchair to the bed. When I was younger, we spent a good two years trying to make this a reality so that as everybody got older, there would be very little lifting involved to do the simplest things. We already do something similar whenever I get a shower, but these two are our next hurdles to accomplish.

I don’t know about you out there, but when I see an opportunity to do something when the other person leaves the room, I usually take it! There have been many times that my mom has came into my room from grabbing some clothes from the laundry room and I am like in between the edge of the commode and my mattress. And to make feel even more uneasy, at this point of time I am usually thinking if I should just take a leap of faith or ask for help. Nine times out of 10, I just jump over to the other side! If I can keep my smile to myself, I can do this without hurting myself in the end.

I know whenever I do this, my mom is proud but of course she is also absolutely afraid that I am going to hurt myself even worse than hitting my feet on the metal parts of the commode. I have told her in the past that if I get hurt than it’s my own fault, so at least I’m taking responsibility for my actions! Now when it comes to my dad, there is no way he would agree to anything of this. I have brought it up that I could scoot over to the other side since it was so close together, but after a couple of seconds he told me no. However, he has been getting some great ideas lately! Once he remembered that the armrests of my manual chair can be removed and the fact that wheelchair lines up perfectly to the bed, I can safely scoot onto it. The first time we did this gave me flashbacks to the time my mom and to do it, but we figure to put on the brakes and my butt went sliding through the end of the seat. So, to say this was the one time where I was terrified was an understatement! We did great though so that is all that happens!

How are you with taking any opportunity that comes your way? Are you more timid about doing things or is it your family that keeps you from taking chances?

A-Z Disability Challenge | N : What I Want To Bring To Nolan’s Life

Before my nephew came along, I was very specific on how I wanted to be represented towards a young child. I had some help creating these thoughts after my neighbor’s three year old daughter started to act like she needed to help me out, although everybody (including myself) thought it was a sweet gesture, it really became clear that this little person looked at me and she shoul help in anyway she coul, even if that meant by holding my cup close enough to face to take a drink.

I understand that she was only doing it to be nice, but she really was doing it for two reasons. One, she getting praise for doing something so benignant and the second is she saw everyone else around her help me out from time to time. I always felt like asking for help was a weakness, so to see this sweet little girl automatically do this, really messed with me for a long time. Although I think it is important for young children to understand all of the disabilities in the world, I also believe there is a way we can teach them about respecting the boundary.

Nolan isn’t at that age where he was can physically lift and carry my drink around to allow me a sip now and again, but he does understand that Aunt Meghan is very different from everybody else.

He loves cars and trucks like every boy does, and whenever he comes over it is one of our favorite things to play with because it is just small enough to put in between his hands and my toes and I can pass it back to him if he wanted to use it. All I have to do is ask for it back and he will either give it to me or exchange another toy for it instead. He’s a stinker like that! He is getting familiar with putting things in my toes rather than my hands; he actually never puts anything in that area which has really surprised me but he was a quick learner as a baby that he understood fast I had certain things “wrong” with me.

Since he was about 10 months old I think, he started to become obsessed with shoes. At first, it was purely just my sister’s flip flops and sandals that he would attempt to put on, but recently he has tried to stick his feet into her sneakers. There is nothing more cuter when a small child tries to put his foot inside the opposite shoe! I mean, this kid’s a genius, he knows how to grab his foot and move it inside of the shoe without really wearing them a whole lot in his short life. I mean, the first time he ever wore shoes out in public I think was on Easter!

The most recent thing to happen was the day when I decided to put on one of Blondie’s shoes, to see what he would think to see me in them. As soon as I got it on and showed off my incredible feat, he outdid me. He grabbed the other one and put it on his hand! This made me realize on how much he pays attention, but the fact that he sees my feet as my hands! I did not expect that reaction but I was very humbled by it at the same time.

I think about the future a lot, and what’ll mean for him if, God forbid, something was to happen to my sister and she wasn’t able to take care of me anymore, the responsibility would turn to him. There is one thing that I will never allow to happen.and this is it, I will firmly stand my ground and tell him that it is more important for him to focus on himself. If I can get this through his mommy’s head I would, but she is far too headstrong for this conversation apparently. Again, I understand the reason behind this but she has been a protector and a great person to take care of me in my time of need but between the two of them, I don’t want them to think they need to continue on that road, you know? There are great places and nurses that can fulfill that promise just as much as they can. I never want to become a burden to anyone, let alone my sister, brother-in-law or Nolan.

What do you think about this? Am I being too harsh about this future situation or is it something you can secretly agree on?

Life Lately | 10 Years Ago

Howdy!

In 2009, I created my first ever blog. Even though it was purely for school, it become one of the best platforms for me. It seemed to arrive at the perfect time and place considering I was in my last year of high school, quickly approaching college and the rest of the unknown. Unfortunately, after graduation everything pretty much went to hell. The only thing that really kept me going was blogging about life.

I have told this story before, but I give a lot of my credit for even creating a blog in the first place to a decision that my Grammar teacher made at the beginning of the school year; she knew that we would probably receive the new laptops sometime in October, which meant we would only have a short time learning about the site in itself and what kind of assignments she wanted us to do on there. The moment we were allowed to explore and change our layouts, I was hooked! You have to remember though, I was a newly senior in high school, I was thrilled about spirit week, campus visits, football, powder puff, homecoming, prom, etc so having a blog was a great way to express myself at that moment of time. Unfortunately, when we finally got the laptops I had already went on my only campus visit and didn’t even think to talk about it on there after a couple of months had passed; of course now I wish I had blogged about it anyways, but it’s okay.

After two years on my first blog, I thought I needed a change, but here’s the real reason why I went from Blogger to WordPress, I just wanted to be able to comment on Mike Shinoda of Linkin Park’s blog. Yeah, that was inspiration to switch over but honestly I really prefer WordPress than any other platforms. They claim to be easy but I’m not really convinced, but that’s my opinion on that issue. Anywho, what started as a way to do something like that turns into a big thing as far as time-consuming and being very passionate to turn it into my sanctuary.


On Saturday, it will officially be ten years since I first started blogging. It definitely doesn’t feel like it was that long ago that I was sitting at my lowered desk by the door, in complete awe on how tiny these laptops were, and learning how to create my first innocent blog post. I would like to mention thank you very much for reading my posts, leaving me sweet comments, and just inspiring me to keep going on my hard days. You are as part of my journey than the blog in general, so again I say thank you!

If you visit my blog’s Facebook page you can join to get updates to my little celebration. I will be sharing around 10 posts that I published throughout the years, You are welcome to not only read them but I would love to know some of your favorites too!

It’s still strange to think I was being graded for those little assignments honestly! What really gets me is that I never had a lot of pressure of working on them as I have in the past couple of years. I may not be graded in the sense of a school project but you can still get noticed by important people that could see you as a potential of working on something that you talk about on your blog. It’s really cool when this happens, but it also puts tons of pressure on yourself to make sure everything in perfect. As you might know, it’s been a roller coaster ride lately because I try to start a new month on a high note, but somehow in the mist of the first two weeks, it’s like I lose my energy and inspiration to do anything blog related so that part sucks, but I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t be angry or sad about it because maybe all I need is a reset. I still have lots of ideas in my head and on notepad but getting the motivation for more than a few days is pretty difficult. I know I’ll come back but there’s no set time on when that’ll be at the moment so you’ll have to be patient with me.


Oh wait! This might be a strange question, but how are you about moodboards? I have been spending a lot of time on Pinterest, creating boards of color aesthetics, and it has been a lot of fun (and I’m pretty sure I am addicted too!). So I thought I would do my own moodboard, and shockingly it was really fun and therapeutic!

As a fun way to celebrate the weekend’s festivities, I have a challenge for you right now. Can you create one? Instead of maybe focusing on one color, which is the easiest thing to do! I chose to use my sunflower rug my mom got me several months ago as the backdrop. I went by the general colors of a bright yellow and various shades of brown because no two sunflowers are alike in the changing seasons. You can stick with my color scheme or use another prominent hue that you have in the room you’re currently in or just around the house. By the way, I’ll give you bonus points if you do it in purple! Have fun with it though! It doesn’t need a lot of objects to get the point across, but I would like to see more than four or six items together.

Here is my first attempt and now it’s your turn! Share them on my Facebook page please! Click here to be transported to the page, if you haven’t already you can “like” it and if you want to see my posts more frequently, you should also click the “follow” tab and select “see first” so you can keep up with me a lot easier!

What do you think of this idea? Should it be a monthly thing on here?

A-Z Disability Challenge | M : Do You Think You Take Too Much Medication?

This is an interesting post for me because I am very self-cautious about any kind of medication, whether it’s for depression or general pain, I am always afraid that I will become dependent of it. My mom tells me all the time that I am not, but that doesn’t necessarily help my paranoia. If I could get by with taking only Advil I would probably be the happiest, but unfortunately that doesn’t help with the muscle spasms or the really intense pain that it can cause in certain places. So, I am stuck in this mental battle of knowing I am fine with my intake but my brain doesn’t allow me to believe so.

My brilliant papaw was a Pharmacist, he went to school for it and afterwards went into the Korean war, but instead of seeing any action, he was sent to Hawaii to work with the doctors on hand. We were told lots of stories about his time there like how the fresh pineapple tastes better than it does at the store and every once in a while he would tick nana off with bragging on how he had a girlfriend there. Honestly we never really trusted him with that piece of information.

My papaw was one of the smartest people I knew, but he unfortunately had issues with pain, and one of the saddest things about this was the amount of pills and empty bottles he would have stashed around the house because he went back and forth thinking that he wouldn’t have enough or people would steal them. You really feel sorry when an older man feels the need to secretly hide medicine for either reason, because if they are anything like my papaw that after discovering three to four bottles of a random amount of pills in each one, having to be monitored by not only their wife but also their daughter who is a nurse, is very heartbreaking! I know that he absolutely hated that, but he had the last laugh because after he passed away, we continued to find bottles up until the house was sold!

There has been a lot of news about doctors and manufacturers being sued for all of the opioid addicts out there, and I am not sorry for this but instead of putting the blame on the doctors, how about you put it on the addicts. It was their choice to use it to not only harm themselves but cause many issues for patients that do not abuse their medication. My dad is one of those people, he has been on a different set of medicine recently for reasons unknown by his doctor and since then he’s actually been in more pain than I think he’s ever been in his life. He has other ailments that are causing him more trouble as he gets older and it sucks to see such a person want to be in bed or on the couch with various amounts of pillows than outside doing stuff. This mess that has finally come to life has really horrible effects for both sides.

Before I end this post, I would like to say that these are my opinions. If you are an addict or have a family member/best friend that has dealt with addictions over the years, I am sorry for you, but I truly believe that most of the general blame is on the wrong people. Let’s make this clear though, there are crooked physicians out there but some of them are desperately trying to help their patients and if they know them well enough that they understand that they’d never want to jeopardize their medication for a temporary high.

So, have you ever felt like you take too much medicine just to get through? It doesn’t matter if it’s mild or intense amount of pain either. What are your thoughts of the opioid epidemic?

A-Z Disability Challenge | K : Why Kids Should Be Educated About The Various Types Of Disabilities

When I was busy coming up with the letters and their themes, I was a little worried whether it would be a good idea to basically talk about children and how they view people with disabilities twice. After discussing it with my mom, she pretty much convinced me that it would be interesting to speak up on different ages, because as I’ve found out over the years, children under the ages of 5 are curious of their surroundings but they want to learn about everything! Kids in that are higher in age and in school may hang out with friends that can influence them to bully other kids. So, this is what we will be talking about on today’s post!

I remember when I was in grade school, we were all in separate classes for all of our subjects. The only time you basically got to see the other students was at lunch and recess. I knew at the time that there was one other kid with a disability, we never saw each other but only on the occasional field trips and grandparent’s programs. That was it! So, I was hardly ever around somebody that was remotely like me, until I had my surgeries in 2002.

The reason why I bring this up is because throughout my entire time in elementary school, I was basically taught to be like everyone else. I never really experienced any bullying although there was one girl who didn’t like me, but we were at least civil with each other. Anyways, I grew up actually hating to be around other kids with disabilities, because they acted differently than me and my friends–now of course, I feel horrible thinking that way but that was my mindset back then; I wasn’t like them but yet I was!

You can never really tell what a kid thinks about things unless they tell you, but when they don’t ask you questions, they will almost go through life not knowing the real answers. They will begin to seek them through their friends, and you hope that everything those kids have been taught are saying good things but unfortunately not all children are being told that having a disability of any kind can be a beautiful thing. Instead they are fearful by what they don’t understand and relying on that information to others.

I always wished that there were more motivational speakers that came to schools with a variety of disabilities. Unfortunately, I also worry if this were to happen, if they would appericate it because I know everytime we had people come in and talk with us, it would literally go in one ear and out in the other. However, there is that small chance that a few kids that enjoy learning about everything, so it could be a positive experience as well!

I think it would be useful for these youngsters to see a plethora of differences in their bodies, we are not going to look like athletes or supermodels, and it’s important to remember that at any age!

I had a thought the other night about this subject. For some reason, all of the speakers that came to talk to us were all adults. What if kids saw teenagers or someone in their early 20’s? If I saw more women and talking about her disability, I wonder if that would have made a difference because I didn’t learn how to love myself until two years after I graduated from high school altogether. It really sucks to know that not only .did I have to be away from my classmates and watch X-Men: First Class to feel like I can love being the way that I am!

When you were in school, how did you view the speakers that came to talk about the aftermath of drunk-driving or their disabilities? Do you think there should be more people talking about other topics that could be helpful to children as they continue to get older?