I Need A Bright Colored Sheet.

For the past 24 hours it’s been very eventful. I am very afraid of wasps and bees, but nothing scares me more than a huge ass spider around my bed in the darkness. I’m pretty sure my parents just went to bed and I only wanted to sit up for an hour of so and I was watching Fraiser like always and I was feeling a bit paranoid but it was nothing out of the ordinary for me. My eye got caught on something and I looked a bit closer and there was a middle size (it looked bigger because of the shadow) spider just chilling by my cup. It terrified me but I didn’t scream. Somehow I managed to keep myself calm and I grabbed my TV remote and I had put my foot above it and I just dropped it and I thought that would be enough to kill it. Either I did get him and there’s a whole flock of them just surrounding my bed, waiting to scare the shit out of me. I did good after that, I was brave enough to use my laptop as my guide and in the process of it I had to take over my headphones in case they fell behind my ears. I looked (more like peeked) through my floor and everything around my cup. Nothing. Well, then about five minutes go by, my paranoia comes back and I find one on the corner of my wall by my bed. I grabbed my remote again and then I realized I had made the worst move in the world.

I have a black sheet on my bed. So if a spider is to crawl around on my bed, I can’t see it and so that strike one for me. The second was, that I don’t have a good balance when I go to scoot on the opposites of my bed. So I tried to basically climb over my pillows and kill it. Well, I missed the first time and he ran from me, which wasn’t really smart. I thought I got him the second time, but by the time I had a chance to celebrate I realized about my sheet and the fact that I had fallen down on the rope that helps me sit up by myself. I had to turn myself around quickly and sit up, turn back around and make sure I got him. Well, I didn’t see him. I assumed he had fallen down the corner of my wall. Nope. He started climbing the other side and he was just high enough that I moved over my pillows this time and I flicked my remote to him at a fast pace and both of them fell down the crack between the bed and the wall. While this was all happening, I didn’t once scream (even though I did shout out “son of a bitch!”) out nor did I text my parents for help. However, I do have a saved text message for my dad in case I just couldn’t kill it. I was running out of patience and losing my calmness too. I did post a long status on my Facebook that almost everybody in my family loved and I even sent my sister a tweet that I needed her to kill this thing. Of course, she’s still at school so she wouldn’t be on spider duty until the weekend. This was my first Facebook status.

“Swore I saw on big ass spider by my cup and I did good, I calmed myself and didn’t scream and I grabbed my remote and unhooked my headphones from my laptop. However, when I dropped my remote it disappeared and I just spent about a good five minutes trying to search for it. Still haven’t found it and I don’t want to grab my remote off the floor. Times like these make want Blondie because she would still be awake right now instead of sleeping. I might need some prayers to get me through the night. Lol”

I didn’t plan on actually to go to sleep last night after all that. I was still in full panic mode and I also ran out of weapons to kill anymore spiders. I just curled up into a little ball on the very edge of my bed and just tried to calm myself down. I wasn’t celebrating or anything, I was still pretty sure that the spider is alive and well somewhere around my bed. At 4:30am, my mom came into my room and grabbed my remote from its place from the third round. She told me that my Facebook status was the funniest thing she’s read in a while. She kept laughing at me because I was in full attack mode and I hadn’t even been up for more than three minutes and I’m just talking to her in my high-pitched voice because I was still on a “high” I guess you can call it that. After she left and turned off my light, I went to watch I Love Lucy because I was still trying to decide if I wanted to go back asleep or not. Well, then as I was laying on my back, I saw this shadow of something flying above my legs and my only instinct is to attempt to cover it up with my blanket. Again, forgetting I have a black sheet on my bed. Thank god for the brightness of laptops and cell phones because that’s basically been my life savers for the entire eight hours. I grabbed my phone and began searching through my bed and blanket. I didn’t find anything. A part of me thinks it was my mind trying to play tricks on me or that it found its way out of my blanket. In the mist of all that I sat up and went on my Facebook to update everybody about my second adventure.

“LITERALLY an hour after my mom goes back to bed and I almost fall back asleep, I see something “fly” around my waist area so I quickly covered it with my blanket. My brain is apparently still sleeping because I keep forgetting that I have a black sheet. Looks like I’m staying up because some damn bug is (hopefully) underneath my blanket and my other blanket is on the floor and I’m too chicken to pick it up. I really want to go back to sleep too!”

I’m not going to lie, next time this all happens I’m texting my parents and letting them yell at me for the next ten minutes of trying to kill something that I know is “harmless” and probably “scared of me too” it just needs to be dead. If this means I’m going to hell, then I’m begging to God and asking him if he laughed at me too! I was so glad to go to my nana’s today. I helped her out with a few things. She got this new big CD/DVD zip case, and I had to show her what I do with mine. Plus, I helped her put away the groceries and even did something new for a change. Some of the “life skills” that I should probably know already, I’m actually learning now. I still can’t tie a knot but I have a feeling that’ll be next. The other day when I was with her, she had hurt her elbow and she wasn’t able to do certain things and I wanted a drink. So I had attempt to open the pop can myself. I have long toe nails (I know for some of you that’s gross, so I’m sorry) and I tried to undo it with just my big toe but I couldn’t get it. My nana gave me this little handy-dandy can opener and I used that and it cracked and when I turned it the other way, it undid itself and I was proud of myself! Today I had a big challenge, my nana can’t get her trash bag on the sides of the trash can. So I decided I’d go for it and I challenged the same calmness I had from last night and it took me a bit and it came undone twice, but I finally did it without falling out of my wheelchair. Some good thing happened and then some freaky bad things happened. It’s a Wednesday, it’s supposed to be somewhat chaotic and weird.

Tune Tuesday #3

It’s been a full of metal favorites in the past week. I’m still pretty picky for all male metal bands and the songs they produce. Sometimes I don’t like it as soon as it comes out and by the time I do say “it’s good” the radio stations have stopped playing it. If that happens then I’m not always happy but if I had learned to not judge so quickly then I wouldn’t have this problem. Anyways, this past week I’ve been listening to three songs that I can’t exactly get out of my system, but in a way I don’t want them to get out of my body either. Instead of two songs, this week I’m giving you three as it’s pretty difficult to choose between all three of them. I’ve been trying to remind myself to play these songs to my dad, but I keep forgetting. I think once he hears them enough he should like them just as much as I do. At least that’s what happened with Five Finger Death Punch. I am always a lover for songs that have a sexy feel to them, but it’s rare when a heavy metal has sexy moments within the actual song. I’ve found that it’s not always the lyrics that make it that way either, it’s usually the guitars! I am breaking this heavy metal fest with an album that is just released today! Hope you enjoy these tunes and what are you listening on this new music Tuesday?

Sangre por Sangre (Blood for Blood) by Hellyeah

Me And Mary Jane by Black Stone Cherry

Take Out The Gunman by Chevelle

Now Listening To:

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Going All Neutral!

It’s another Monday here and surprisingly after all the storms last night, it looks like the sun is trying to make its escape from the clouds right now. On Monday’s, I am apart of the new challenge called #BloggersDoItBetter and the topic for today is bright and neutral. At first, I didn’t have a clue what to write about, especially since I had written about nails last night! The only idea I actually got just now is going all neutral with absolutely no make up at all! We’ve all seen the different challenges and celebrities take their makeup off and then post a “selfie.” Some odd reason, that ends up front and center on a magazine website. Well, my question for you is, well I have two questions for you actually.

Have you ever went without make up on your face and chest?

How many days have you went without makeup before?

What I’m about to tell you right now will be kind of shock for those of you who can’t leave the house without some sort of makeup on. I never have makeup on. Literally! When I was younger, I was like every other girl in school looking at other women and girls and loving the bright blue eye shadow and lipstick that my nana always used when we’d go out to eat. I remember her letting my sister and I wear this very light shade of pink lipstick into Red Lobster, Blondie looked very good with the pink that it actually became a thing with her later on in life. When I hit middle school and high school, I was in the middle of liking makeup and hating it at the same time. It was something I couldn’t do myself because of the fact that I can’t reach up that far. So my mom and sister would have to do it for me in the mornings.

There were very few days in my senior year that I actually wore makeup because that’s when I just got so tired with it, that I just gave up on it. My sister would have nights were she was bored so she gave me makeovers and I always cherished those because they were so rare. Afterwards, we’d basically have a little photo shoot in my room. For my senior year prom I actually didn’t wear any makeup at all. I only had that fake tanning stuff that you put on your body and after so many times of using it, the skin gets tanner. My dress had no sleeves and the chest area was open and we only used it twice in the two weeks we had to get ready for it. My chest was white as snow but my arms and shoulders were somewhat tan. It was a disaster!

It’s kind of funny for the weird days of actually wanting to put on makeup, but thankfully I have none so those thoughts go away as fast as they came! One essential that my sister always has is her eyeliner and mascara. She never really uses lipstick/lip gloss anymore, but she uses a natural blush on her cheeks. Something else that’s interesting that I don’t allow very many things around my eyes (you should see how I am at the eye doctor!) but I am fine with Blondie putting the eye makeup on me. I trust her a lot more than anyone else in that area. In September, I am going to a wedding and I’m trying to decide if I want her to put eyeliner/mascara on me or not. My problem is that I don’t know if I can get my mom to do it if she’s at school that day. I do know that I have to wear bold red lipstick as my friend knows that it’s on my bucket list. It’s only on special occasions that I want to wear makeup, but on other days I want nothing to do with it. So, do you think you could go a day or two without a shed of makeup on your face?

A Good Day Indoors

I really hate myself for not doing this post yesterday, but when mom was driving me home I was feeling a little weird. I guess I had used up more energy than I thought I had. When I first got home, I originally had plans on doing this as I had uploaded the pictures, edited them, and all that. Even though I was just saying yesterday that I usually have a good memory, I didn’t want to forget the little things. You know how much that would suck if I forget now? I’ve known about going over there for about two or three months now. I’m usually the type of person that hates being told I’m going somewhere that’s a couple of months ahead of right now. So my usual thought process was, “why did she say that, because when the time comes, it won’t happen?” A little bit of no expectations, no disappointments came into my mind like it always does. Every visit is this way and everytime I do over somewhere, we tend to never go back. Which isn’t a good thing for me because I ALWAYS expect these times to go the exact same way. The more the date came closer, I started to get really worried and then yesterday morning I woke up to my dad being sick. I literally wanted to hit the wall. However, I prayed that night before that if things didn’t pan out just get me to be positive. So even though I was getting worried and feeling bad for him too, I was not stuck in my thoughts like when these things happen.

850170174I woke up at 7am yesterday. I’ve finally been able to put my music on a low volume to listen to it while my folks are still asleep. So far they haven’t complained about it yet. My mom woke up at 9:30 or 10am and I had to try really hard to shield my smile because when I got and took off my covers I was feeling happy. I was still worried on the inside, but happy on the outside. My mom got me dressed and everything. My poor dad had a toothache but was still going on the bike ride. I’ve got to say I’ve never rode on the back of my dad’s bike because of two reasons, one sometimes my balancing sucks and two, well dad just doesn’t want me to ride it. Yesterday my mom drove her car behind dad, since he was driving the motorcycle. I’ve got to say, I haven’t done that before with him and it was really nerve-wrecking! It was so nice to go there and see all of the pretty green, white, pink, and purple leaves. Spring brings out the happy colors. When we got there, I was surprised they got my wheelchair inside their house because it looked from my place in the car that it wasn’t going to fit. There’s a pretty good step when you go into their place, so I knew I wasn’t going outside. It was okay there, I didn’t want to leave when I first got inside. When I go to people’s houses in my electric wheelchair I feel somewhat in the way of everything, that’s another thought that never tries to leave me alone but I managed to shut it off for a while. Their house was small but very roomy. Kristen and Casey don’t smoke in their house either, which I sort of envied because it smelled amazing throughout the house! Candles and Scenty candles everywhere! There was one on the kitchen table that added this pop, that didn’t need to be there, but it was an extra detail. It smelt like pineapple, at least that’s what I thought it smelled like, I could be wrong.

850170130My mom had told me that morning that Kristen took her daughter Katie to get some things and one of the things they got were two different nail polishes. They got this very bright orange – it wasn’t a neon color, because it had a darker tone to it. The other color was a darker but sort of light shade of purple. I regret not doing a two coat while using that color but it was somewhat difficult to paint a little girl’s fingers when I’ve actually never done it before. My nana has been awesome practice though so can’t complain much, Katie was really good with me though! She and her brother Aiden know about my feet and arms, so she did her best not making any sudden movements on me. Casey gave us some paper towels and Q-Tips for the mistakes. I only wanted three of them but I’m glad he gave us six because we needed them! Katie was very like my little helper, she took pictures for me and attempted to wipe the extra polish on the sides of her fingers for me. It was a fun bonding time for the both of us, I feel bad that I had to leave before she could do mine. I know how much she was looking forward to doing that. So I feel bad about that. Aiden and I bonded over our fear of bees and wasps, actually everybody but Maci and Casey are afraid of them! I contained my fear of them as best as I could but at times it was a bit difficult to do. I didn’t want to freak Kristen or the kids out so I kept my mouth shut. Aiden had apparently got stung by a bee on the back several times on Friday at recess, so the poor kid’s been a little freaked out by them ever since. I don’t blame him either honestly!

I ate lunch with the kids and one of their neighbor and friend’s kids. We had hot dogs and french fries. I actually had a hot dog that didn’t get warmed up in the microwave. Maybe that’s why I liked it more than I usually do! Casey was offering to cook them for her, because (and I just thought he was kidding) Kristen doesn’t like hot dogs. She literally grabbed the very edge of the packaging to get them out of the fridge and had to be delicate to get the wrappings to open and she used a fork to get each one out. It was kind of hilarious! She was nice enough to feed me even though Katie had offered first! One of the rules for the kids was that they can’t leave the table without eating all of their food. Aiden had basically eaten a half a box of candy he still had from Easter and he still managed to eat everything on his plate. Katie was a pistol and tried to talk her way out of eating everything. I wasn’t trying to be a good role model to them and I still ate everything on my plate. Afterwards, the kids went outside to play and I went back into the living room to play “fetch” with Maci who thought it was funny of me to chase after her pacifier everytime it landed on the floor. She attempted to crawl around on the ground a couple of times, but she’s a bit lazy. Casey took her out for a walk to get some Life Saver gummies. Little Maci loves them but sometimes she likes to spit them right out and they land on her legs. We found like three on her legs. When my mom and dad got back, it was three hours after I got there. I was not a happy camper. Mom tried to get him to stay out a little longer for me but he was tired. So they came back.

850170024They were supposed to go to the bike rally thing and they missed it by 20 minutes even though they got there on time. So they improvised and drove around. They went to see my dad’s grandma and his puppy Bugsey. My mom posted a couple of pictures of the three of them. It was so cute! When they got there, dad stayed there for like five minutes and then went home. My mom stayed a little longer and sat in the living room and talked with Kristen and Casey. The kids were playing indoors and outside. By the time we left I didn’t want to leave physically, but by a half hour in the car I could feel my body feeling a little weird. I say “weird” because I can’t exactly describe what I was going through. I felt tired but I didn’t know how I could be THAT tired. I’m pretty sure I got more than eight hours of sleep last night. Everytime I got up in the middle of the night, I went back to school. That never happens. I had lots of fun yesterday. Next time Katie will paint my nails. This morning when I woke up, I wasn’t THAT happy like I was yesterday morning, but after mom got back from doing my nana’s errands. She brought back a Lavender shirt that I really want to tie dye! And she also got me Banana Nut Muffins! I was thinking of having the Reese’s cookies that Kristen made yesterday and gave me to take home for breakfast but I can have them later.

Which Would You Choose?

visual writing prompts
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I like this kind of prompt because it gets my mind to really think about my answer. The only bad part of this is as long as I had a full reign of where each place was then it would much more difficult for me to choose. I love all three of these choices honestly. I think I would enjoy each of them very well and that’s why that is another reason why this would be difficult to choose as well. Everybody knows I am a bookworm, so a library would suit me well. However, it can’t be just any of old ordinary library in a small town though. I would get bored with a smaller library than a larger. If I’m going to be there for the rest of my life I would want to go to National Library of Congress in Washing D.C. I’ve seen the movie National Treasure: Book Of Secrets enough to know that this is the largest library in the country and has over 36 million books there. I would be set for the rest of my life if I would to live in that place. Is it sad that I have actually had dreams of living in a library before? Not that library, but in a smaller one? It was kind of cool because I pictured somebody was trying to break in and steal something and I was like a spy, nobody was stealing anything from there. There’s my inner nerd coming out loud and clear.

A museum, well for starters I haven’t been to many museums, only to a few when I was younger. They were kiddy museums but still wonderful and I could see myself living in one of them. Especially the Children’s Museum in Indianapolis, IN. I have went there twice. Once when I was in fifth grade, it was our last big trip for school and they got these HUGE buses to bring us there so we wouldn’t have to use our uncomfortable school buses for the two-hour drive there. We actually had comfortable seats, which was nice because I was still recovering from my surgeries and I don’t remember feeling any of the bumps on our way there and coming home. I went back when I was 19 and I was in a push wheelchair with my aunt, her husband at the time, and my little cousin. Everybody we went around probably thought I was a lot younger than I was, which at that time and place I was perfectly fine with that. I had basically driven myself crazy for going to a children’s museum when I was almost twenty. I would love to visit an art museum one day, but I would rather live out the rest of my days in the Children’s Museum any day. Especially if they had that big Ancient Egypt exhibit going on. I would be in heaven, because that was the reason why I went there when I was 19 years old. Don’t judge me!

 Living in a zoo, man! Every kid probably wants that honestly. It’s bad enough that my dad and I had seen the advertisement for St. Louis Zoo on my TV Wednesday afternoon. We both watched it and I said to him, “my inner kid wants to go back” and then we saw where it was from and we both said “hey!” at the same time. While I was having my surgeries we could take trips with our families and we went there twice. My roommate’s mom invited  my mom and I to go with them and then my roommate and I went with Great Length’s group and it was so nice both days. I always say I want to go to the zoo, because I generally do. I don’t think that part of you ever doesn’t want to never go back to the zoo. If you don’t like zoo’s you’re not right in the head. Zoos opened your mind of the world and it’s animal kingdom. I’ve been to countless different zoos and aquariums but I always want to go back, but it never happens. I actually have it on my “bucket list” that I’d like to be taken on a date to the zoo one day. I’m actually being serious about it too. I would. If I had to live out the rest of my days in a zoo, I think I’d get bored quickly. Because unless I was actually feeding the animals or holding babies then what’s the point of going back everyday? So I’d say no to ever wanting to live there if I had a choose but I would still love to go back and visit though!

TV Review: Black Box

I haven’t done this in a while so forgive me if it’s not perfect. I wasn’t even going to do this, but I have to in a weird way. 

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We assume the people that we see in our daily life is normal and doesn’t have any skeletons in their closets. We reassure ourselves that the professionals are perfectly healthy in their both their personal and professional lives, but we don’t live in a perfect world. We all have our problems, sometimes there are more people out there with worse conditions. In the life of ABC’s new show Black Box leading female character Dr. Catherine Black is a famous neurologist who has a good family, a loving boyfriend who wishes to marry her, and a great career of taking care of patients who are like her in a way. You see, Catherine also known as Kate is bipolar and the only people who know about it is her older brother and his family, plus her shrink she sees on a daily basis. The series is about the constant struggle between the two Catherine Black’s, the one who takes her medicine everyday and the woman who loves the incredible high of being free of everything, her emotions, thoughts, and the drugs that make her “normal.” In just the first ten minutes of the first episode you get a mini roller coaster ride of both sides to not only this troubled woman, but also the patients she treats as well.

I have been seeing the previews on my TV for a while, probably two or three months now. At first, it didn’t seem interesting but as I kept watching it them every time they came up during the commercials. I couldn’t fight it, I had to see what it was really about, the previews weren’t enough to really try to understand her. Kelly Reilly plays Dr. Catherine Black, and after finishing it a little bit ago, she really brought out the character in every shade that she could. Catherine can smart, brilliant, and loving to the ones she’s around but then when she’s off her meds she’s the total opposite. In the words of Dr. Black, “sometimes I do very bad things.” You feel some sympathy for her because you can see the lost in her eyes but the beast living inside grows stronger and stronger and she loses it. I think there’s two key importances within the her story. One is we assume too quickly. Not every disability is curable and easy to see through the naked eye. I’ve never really understood that statement until now. Can you imagine to how many doctors, nurses, politicians, musicians, actors, and others are living with a mental illness. Sometimes it may not be them, but they might have it in their families. Kelly’s character got the illness from her mother, who committed suicide when Catherine and her brother were young. Catherine has said in the first episode a lot, because of her mother and the disorder. She thinks if her mother couldn’t handle her children, she wouldn’t be either.

The second importance is you see a lot about Catherine’s good side when she’s around her niece and her patients. Two patients were introduced on the episode, one is very young and in college but he draws constantly on the walls and imagines things. Past doctors have concluded that he has schizophrenia, but Black sees something else within him and leads it into another diagnoses instead. The other patient is a lady, who was probably in her early or mid 60’s who have hullucinatios of dwarves. One you come to know as “Yojo” and she has dementia that’s slowly advancing. Dr. Black orders her to be on medicine to make her stop seeing her friends, but when Kate goes off her medicine again, she takes back her original orders. The ending is a somewhat happy ending for that character. I hate watching Catherine’s battle with her disease but it is a very interesting matter of how she’s able to keep it hidden from not only her patients but her peers as well. I can’t wait for the next few episodes to see what happens next of the life of Dr. Catherine Black and her patients she treats. I think this show will open Pandora’s Box of we see with our own eyes and let someone treat us. Watch “Black Box” starring Kelly Reilly and Vanessa Redgrave, on ABC at 9/10pm EST.

The Disney Tag

I saw this girl Amy, who originally did this, ask for people to be nominated to do her Disney tag and my first thought was, “awesome!” but I thought if I did it, I would be in the drawing for a giveaway and I can’t do those, so that was my REAL reason why I didn’t reply back to her. However, she did nominate me on Twitter after the fact! I’m listening to my Disney playlist as we speak because if you’re not listening to Disney songs when you’re doing these kinds of things, you’re not right in the head. Now onto the tag!

What is your favorite Disney film:

My favorite Disney movie, I’ve always loved the Princess themed movies the most, but I watched The Hunchback Of Notre Dame and I remembered my love of the darkness and hatred I still have for people like Frollio. Another favorite is The Lion King: Simba’s Pride. I was and STILL obsessed with this movie. It’s the only one I have on DVD. 


Who is your favorite Disney character?

Esmeralda is my favorite because she was such a strong character on her own. She had such a good heart and cared deeply for her friends and people.  She wasn’t the type of person that she wasn’t going to down without a fight and there needs to be more people like her in the world. Demi Moore was such a good actress to bring her to life.

Who is your favorite Disney Princess, and why?

I’ve always answered this question with Sleeping Beauty’s Aurora, but after watching Frozen my love of Elsa and Anna, have changed my way of thinking. I think the feeling of hopefully finding my “prince charming” one day and dreaming of him, has been replaced with finding love in the people you already have, like family.

Who would you rather be: Sleeping Beauty or Cinderella?

I like the both the same, but I’ve always been an “Aurora” fan for a long time.

Who would rather be: Hercules or Tarzan?

Hercules, but only for the unbelievable strength and being fearless!

Who would you rather be: Lizzie McGuire or Raven Baxter?

I’m already like both in ways, but I liked Raven’s style the most.

What is your favorite Disney song?

This is the tricky question  because you just have one song. I love the Tarzan soundtrack out of all the soundtracks, but favorite songs, well there’s “God Help The Outcasts,” “Once Upon A Dream,” “I Won’t Say (I’m In Love),” “A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes,” “Bells Of Notre Dame,” “When You Wish Upon A Star,” “Beauty And The Beast,” “Some Day My Prince Will Come,” and “Let It Go.”

Which Disney character would be your best friend?

Alice, because I like in wonderland almost everyday.

Which Disney character would be your pet?

Niko and Olaf. Those were my favorites. ♥

Have you ever been to Disneyland? If so, which one?

I went to Disney World in Florida in 2003 after being apart of the Make-A-Wish foundation. It hadn’t been a full year after I had my surgeries and we went there, and mom took us to Splash Mountain as a trick. After we got off of the ride, we were mad at her and then we got in trouble so we took the train as our last ride and left the park. That part sucked because we hadn’t gotten to meet any of the cool characters just Mickey and Goofy and that was it. 😦