Step One: Thinking Process

Well last night I had a good talk with my mom. Apparently “My Love/Hate Relationship With Art” is coming back for round two. I’ve been thinking a lot. Thinking of quitting drawing altogether was a bad idea. Everybody thinks so, but I’ve got so many thoughts bouncing back and forth going, “you can’t do it so why even try?” To the one everybody wishes I’d believe, “you can do it.” It’s a lot easier to say than actually doing it. Something my mom told me last night was, “how can you not look at your drawings and not see something to be proud of?” I think that’s how she said it. This was around midnight and I had my headphones on (not playing anything) but it’s a little hard to hear after you’ve had to stopped suddenly when you’re listening to something very loudly. I do look at the two drawings that are on the walls in front of me. After a while though, sometimes you look at your own artwork and think, oh, this should have been bigger or darker. It really sucks after a while. I’d love to draw again, but like I said it’s so much easier said than done.

After talking to mom, I actually went on Bing and searched for pictures. Everything I felt at the beginning of doing my portraits in school came flooding back. That same feeling of ok, let’s do this! Since I’ve put myself in this little web between Guns N Roses and Motley Crue, I started thinking, ok, I listen to Motley Crue, but why am I still obsessing over Gn’R? I don’t understand. I only like one song by them. That’s it, but I do like Slash, Duff McKagan, and DJ Ashba. So I then I talked to my nana about it. I told her I’m not really into the “new” Gn’R, and I think I know why. Since I’ve read both Slash’s book and reading now Duff’s book, I kind of fallen for what use to be. Not the drug and alcohol part, but the original members. Since Nikki is in Motley and DJ is in Gn’R I started thinking, I do a lot of this. Especially at night. Well LP has 6 members, Motley has 4 and Gn’R has 5, and Sixx:A.M. has 3. That’s 12 people altogether. It’s not too bad, with the right mindset at least. Give or take, 12 people. 12 portraits. Well my mom did say, “draw big.” I don’t think she saw this one coming though.

Could I draw 12 people? Technically, it’s just their head. I could never draw hands, but I could draw shoulders though. I have ideas of how I want to do a few portraits. Kind of like a before and after picture. Something like that. Which would be interesting to somebody whose face hasn’t changed throughout the years. I only have three people so far as pictures go. So I have to search for 9 more. I hope I find some good head shots, if I don’t I might need to ask for some from my new Twitter friends, who most of them are Gn’R and Motley fans. Thank god! Speaking of Motley, for some reason I’m thinking of leaving them last. Even though I should do them first, they seem to be getting pushed farther back in my mind. I guess I must really want to do this or I wouldn’t be pushing others back from my mind. This is just step one.

2 thoughts on “Step One: Thinking Process

  1. I think everybody has moments where they think they cannot draw, I certainly do, and as for hands, it’s my new years resolution; I have to learn to draw hands and feet. Every artist has to start somewhere.


    1. Oh I can’t do anything from the shoulders down. In school, our teacher had us draw a person in our class and I only had the face and that was it. Lol. I’m just worried about it because I don’t feel that confidence I once had. Maybe once I start drawing actual things, maybe it’ll come back to me. At least I’m hoping it happens that way. 🙂


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